Judge, 1922-01-21 · page 28 of 36
Judge — January 21, 1922 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains a detective story ("Order Filled Promptly!" by Edna R. Smith) and several brief satirical items. **Main Story**: Detective Graham catches a pickpocket named Pete by setting a trap using banker Fuller. Graham exploits Pete's reformed reputation to manipulate him into stealing Fuller's watch—proving Fuller's arrogant boast about never losing anything was unfounded. The irony: Fuller's own overconfidence made him vulnerable. **"Hughes' Zoo"**: A Charles A. Hughes cartoon showing giraffes on a swing—appears to be visual whimsy without clear political reference (unclear if "Hughes" references a specific person). **Brief Satires**: - "A Correction": Mocks an anti-war orator by suggesting people follow money, not principles - "Movie Pastry": Jokes about heavy movie-theater pie - "Sticks to the Old Type": Critiques hypocrisy—praising intellectual women in print while refusing to photograph them The page exemplifies Judge's blend of narrative humor, visual satire, and social commentary typical of early 20th-century American humor magazines.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Order Filled Promptly! HUGHES’ ZOO “Get his watch and bring it to me. By Edna R. Smith Merely a little josh, you understand. : i t won’t get you in wrong.” GRAHAM eyed the jostling crowd . Indignantly, the man demurred. in the hotel lobby speculatively. 3 “Aw, Mr. Graham—you can’t frame Fat night for pickpockets!” he sug- one on me like that! I tell you I’m = gested. gy The heavy-jowled bank president : loosened a button of his taut vest. “You detectives,” he bantered, “think the whole world’s crooked. Look at me! I’ve never lost anything, and I’ve carried the same gold watch for twenty years. Come have a cigar, and forget the cruel world.” A half-hour later, Graham glimpsed a pleasant-faced, quietly-dressed gen- tleman caught in the human eddy that swirled about the revolving doors. The i detective’s eyes twinkled. “Think we'll make Fuller eat his words,” he chuckled in an aside to the rest of the party, and unobtrusively | withdrew. | “Well, Pete?” he queried casually, as he reached the door. The man wheeled. “I’m goin’ straight, Mr. Graham! Honest I am! Ever since you caught me on that Ontario deal, I’ve been off it—I—” “Certainly, Pete; I didn’t doubt it for a minute. But how about doing me a little favor, eh?” The man recovered his poise. “T'll say I will! Anything I can do for you, sir—on the level, of course—” “See the fat man standing by the straight! Why, I been workin’ six months in a garage. I wouldn’t go back to that life for a million. I tell you I'm through!” “I congratulate you, Pete. But I’m not asking you to go back. Just to get me that watch,” Graham persisted quietly, “just as a friend.” The man started to protest once more; then, suddenly, he shrugged. “Oh—all right!” he snarled. “You win. If I'd guessed you were here—!” And he drew a watch from his pocket and flung it into the detective’s hand. Graham started. It was Fuller's watch! A CORRECTION “Commercialism breeds war,” cried the orator. “I tell you, friends, man comes before money.” “He may come before it,” piped a thin voice, “but he goes after it.” MOVIE PASTRY “These pies are too heavy to eat.” “They are to throw.” STICKS TO THE OLD TYPE “You are insincere. You praise intellectual women in print.” Extract from best seller — Bewitchingly palm to the right of the pillar?” attired in ultra-modern fashion, there sat “Well?” | _ “Where? Oh, over there? Yes, fair Gwendoline rhythmically oscillating in “But you don’t print any photo- sir. the old swing. graphs.” ow to sail an ice -yacht?” MEnais tore ein shates!” iF par te