Judge — November 12, 1921 — page 26: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE POLO CRAZE SPREADS The Browne-Smiths v. Surbiton-Jones compete for the Surbiton Polo- Croquet Championship.—London Opinion. The Limit of Valor The swain and his swainess had just encountered a bulldog that looked as if his bite might be quite as bad as his bark. “Why, Percy,” she exclaimed as he started a strategic retreat, “you al- ways swore you would face death for me.” “IT would,” he flung back over his shoulder, “but that darn dog isn’t dead.”—London Opinion. ‘TEETOTATISM—AIl teetotal drinks are abominable things, but none is so abominable as the teetotal drink that is bottled and labeled and col- ored like, and called ale. It holds not only the physical danger of being a dispiriting and gassy concoction, but the mental danger of being mis- taken for a rational drink. It is an awful thing to have the pleasant an- ticipation of a glad heart and then to experience a stomach-ache. — The Bodleian. A LonG Way—It is still a long way to normalcy when a lot of girls who were satisfied with porch swings last year are insisting on automo- biles.—Sacramento Union. GETTING A START—“Why is it cus- tomary to have weddings in June?” “It’s a wise custom. The young couple needn’t start off with a coal problem, anyhow.”—Louisville Cour- ier-Journal. DuBIOUS COMPLIMENT—Mrs. O’Brien—They say it’s not polite te be helped twice, Mr. Flaherty, but ye’ll take another piece of my cake, won’t ye? Flwherty—Indade Oi will that, Mrs. O’Brien. Shure, it’s the height av politeness to ate a av such cake as Transcript. Diogenes in Town Diogenes was peering about the byways of New York. In his han he bore an electric searchlight. “What are you looking for now, old fellow?” someone asked, “an honest man?” “No,” answered Diogenes. “I’ve lost a prescription.” — Vancouver Province. ONE TRAVELER’S REMARKS—‘The road to hell is paved with good in- tentions,” says the proverb, but, as a modern politician has remarked, the beauty of the pavement does not im- prove the destination—The Bod- leian. RANK EXTRAVAGANCE—Insurance Agent—But you surely agree to tak- ing out an insurance policy to cover ycur burial expenses? Wily Scot—Na, na, mon; I micht be lost at sea!—The Passing Show (London). OVERHEARD — Hilda —I1_ simply adore Nature. I just love birds and flowers. Willie—On hats, I suppose.—Lon- don Answers. Fond Mother—Don’t you wish you could paint as well as that, Clarence? Clarence (firmly)—I can.—London Mail. 2) comicbooks.com