Judge — June 4, 1921 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Energy of Emotion “ONE CAN COMFORTABLY READ THE PAPERS ONLY WHEN WALKING Nowapays WHEN ont SITS ONE KEEPS CONSTANTLY JUMPING UP FROM ANGER."—Meggenderfer Blactter (Munich). ON'PaE FARM fy Up-to-Date E'VE bathed the bossie’s tootsies, ned the rooster’s ears, 's wattles with we've cle: We've trimmed the turkey antiseptic shears. With talcum all the guinca hens are beautiful and bright, And Dobbin's wreath of gleaming tecth we've burnished snowy white. With pungent sachet powder we've glori- fied the dog; And when we have the leisure we'll mani- cure the hog. We've done all in our power to have a barn de luxe We've dipped the sheep in cau de rose; we've sterilized the ducks. The little chicks are daily fed on sanitated worms, The calves and colts are always boiled to keep them free from germs. And thoroughly to carry out our prophy- lactic plan, Next week we think we shall begin to wash the hired man.—Journal of the American Medical Association. Labor on the Farm—‘ Mechanical improvements have done a lot of labor- saving for us agriculturists,” observed Si Smith. “They have that,” agreed Farmer Corntossel. ‘There's no end to the work and worry we've been spared since they invented self-starters for our auto mobiles. "—Washington Star, Of Course Not—A resident of the rural districts, Louis by name, brought a load of hogs to the local stockyards and they were sold by Ben, another native of the fatherland. Later in the day Louie was digesting the account of the sale, when Ben approached and inquired: “Louie, did your hogs weigh as much as you thought they would?” Louie replied. “No, they didn’t, but 1 didn’t think they would.”—Indian. apolis News. Human Fallibility—“ Josh,” said Farmer Corntossel, “do you remember the time you went to town and got trimmed by a confidence man?” “T'll never forget it, father,” replied the young man. “Why do you mention ie “IT have been listenin’ patiently to your advice about how I run the farm. I thought mebbe recallin’ that episode might make you a little more generous toward any mistake I happen to make.” —Washington Star. Seems Longer—Redd—It is said that a farmer lives a third longer than a tradesman. Greene—I guess they’ve got that right. I spent a few days on a farm once, and they were the longest days of my whole life!— Yonkers Statesman. Leadership—Three Winnipeg labor leaders have left jail to take their seats in the Legislature. Strange how one thing leads to another these days.— New York Evening Post. Appalling—If the human race is 250,000 years old, it is appalling to think about how many politicians have been born into the world.—Birmingham Age Herald, Pie—A California man who won “all the pie he could eat” on the election of Mr. Harding has written the President to tell him about it. The President would have been happier to hear from this man if he had won enough pie to go around.—Detroit News. Just the Thing—“I must have jobs for constituents.” ¥ “Senator, this bureau is already over- manned.” “Then I'll put in a few women voters.” —Louisville Courier-Journal. Alas, too True—“If we ever have a woman President, do you suppose she would be justified in appointing her hus- band to a place in the cabinet?” “It isn’t likely. If we ever elect a woman President, she'll probably have the kind of husband who wouldn't be com- petent to hold down a third-class post- mastership."”"—Birmingham Age- Herald. Throwing the Wrong Bull Near-Sighted Salesman—Now, sir, THIS ts THE BEST HAT IN THE Customer—I'm ixcuinep To AGREE, BUT I’b LIke A CHANGE. You SEE, THAT'S my HAT! — Passing Show (London). comicbooks.com