Judge — May 21, 1921 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

— Handsome is as Handsome Gloves axymutne! I want I won't Give you EXACTLY, MY DEAR LADY Much Improved— Mrs. Flatbush My husband surprised me very much tonight Mrs. Bensonhurst—And why? “When he came home he was as pa tient and good-natured as could be.” “Of course. He'd been playing golf all the afternoon with my husband, and nably lost all his temper on the Yonkers Statesman he pr links.” Linked with Work favorite diversion?” “No,” replied Mr. Gadspur. But you play quite often.” Exactly. I took up golf under the impression that it would be my favorite diversion, but I have since discovered that it is about the hardest thing I do.” Birmingham Age- Herald. “Is golf your His Rainy y Amusement. “Brown's getting sloppy. He has not had his hair cut in a month.” “know. He used to be very neat, but since he’s taken up golf he now waits fora rainy day before he'll take time to go to the barber shop.” —Detroit Free Press. Superseded—Mrs. Scadds—And just think of what a loving couple they were Your HANDS ARE PostTIVELY GRiMy!” UY A PAIR OF GLOVES.” Le Rire (Par when they got married. I wonder what caused them to quarrel so. Mrs. Gossip—I found out today. She plays a better game of golf than he does Boston Globe Redd—Vou Not Made That Way don’t think that clothes make the man, do you? Greene—Certainly not “Why, then, did you imagine a red tand plaid stockings would make a f player?” —Yonkers Statesman Germany Has No Volsteadier “Hisaet, | Nevek KNEW THE EARTH RE- votven so rast!" —Flicgende Blactter (Mun- “How do fireless The New Temptation you manage to sell so many cookers? “It’s due to my method of approach,” said the smart salesman. I begin my little talk by saying, ‘Madam, [have called to enable you to. spend. every afternoon at the mo’ '"—Birmingham cAge- Herald. An Auburn, Mo., 1 to quit A Nose for Trade merchant named Myers deci¢ business and offered to sell his stock to a born trader of the neighborhood named Meriweatherat what it invoiced, $1,900. “TL won't take it at that,” said Meri weather. “T'll give you twentytfive cents for every article and package in the Myers thought of his big line of pencils worth a cent Two men were hired Slate pencils, clothes hewing-gum and pa cents each, store.” slate and lead apiece and agreed to help check up. pins, packages of pers of pins were listed at stomobile tires, barrels of sugar ec. An egg was worth as much The result so were and ce as a 50-yard bolt of cotton. was that Meriweather bought the stock for $1,866.25, or just $33.75 less than the invoice price. You can’t beat a born trader.—Cupper's Weekly Lonesome for His Wares~— Mooney, the traveling salesman, was a bit de- pressed, for trade was bad. It was the end of another blank day and the dis couraged drummer called on another chant to display his samples “But 1 want nothing today,” merchant “Atleast you will just examine my line said the of goods?” suggested Mooney. The merchant thought not. “In that suggested meekly, “will you permit me the use of your counter to look at them myself? I have not had the opportunity to do so for — Philadel phia Ledger. case,” Mooney some time A Dangerous Subject—Proprictor of Clothing Store—Why did that customer leave so suddenly without buying? What did you say to him? Clerk—Why, we were looking over some suits and I merely asked him if he ever wore stripes. Pror pietor—It’s a wonder he didn’t kill That man has just completed a Boston Transcript. you. ten-year sentence. comicbooks.com