Judge — May 14, 1921 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

NISTERS NONIST Me a It Pays—The local minister intimated in his sermon on “Why Do Fish Bit Better on Sunday Than Any Other Day?” that the theory was a delusion and a snare and a hoax to keep good fishermen away from church, That night a friend brought him a fine string of fish and the saddle of a frog. While the Rev. Mr. Carter is still in doubt on his original proposition he is certain that it pays to advertise, —Lama (Ga.) Journal, Persuasive Spieler—“How was the sermon?” “Very good, I believe, but the evan- gelist was a reformed safe-blower and 1 couldn't understand the slang, into which he translated the Scriptures. He must have been eloquent though. He converted three detectives." —Birm- am Age- Herald. Logical Indignation—The Nebraska man who was fined for snoring in church is indignant that the parson who lulled him to sleep got off scot free.—Vancouver Province The Fruits of Winking—A_ good story against himself is being told by a Nonconformist divine of the severe old sch who, however, is not without a Sympathy SA « our q “Dip YOUR HUSBAND LEARN THAT YOU WERE OUT WITH ME LAST EVENING?” “He must HAVE, FOR WHEN I Got Home HE Satp TO ate, ‘poor xto!'”—Karikaturen (Christiania) No Time for Little Things —'Ave yer Got yer pivorce yer, Mrs. Sern? No, Mrs. Brows. I've Lost BOTHER ANY MOKE.—The Tatler (London sense of humor. He was traveling north Just before he got to York he opened the carriage window, with the result that he got a piece of grit in his eve. He rubbed it and did all the usual things, but it still troubled him, and every now and again he had involuntarily to wink When he got to York he went into the buffet and asked for a glass of milk. This being served, he gulped it down, and then realizing that something was wrong, he said to the barmaid, “That wasn’t milk, was it?” “No, sir, rum and milk.” “But [asked you for milk.” “Yes, sir, But you tipped me the wink.""—London Post. Good Golf Words, Too—A minister in Chicago is quoted as saying that “hell” and “damn” are not profane words when properly used. That is to say, we take it, when used in the pulpit. Chattanooga Times. "ARF A DAY ALREADY MESSING ABOUT: I SHAN'T A Kept Something On—“Was that your model going out as I came in?” asked the visitor to the studio of a painter-friend, “Yes; and a very good model she i was the artist’s reply. Does she ever pose in the nude?” No; she never takes off her diamond rings.” —Venkers Statesman Realism—Friend (viewing picture)— How realistic! It fairly makes my mouth water. Artist—A sunset makes your mouth water? Friend—Bless me! I thought it was a fried egg.—Boston Transcript. comicbooks.com PORE WO. ear a | | ——_——