Judge — April 9, 1921 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

They Wake in Wedlock—" They dream in courtship, but in wedlock wake."’—Pope. In courtship. “Just see how the rain keeps pouring; how gloomy and dark it is. But we don’t care, do we, Marie? We're so happy together the weather has no effect on us at all, at all!” And he kisses her. In wedlock. “What a nasty day! Will the rain never stop? Every time I plan a game of golf it pours ‘pitchforks and nigger babies.’ Stay home the whole blessed day—think of it! What makes you always look so glum on a rainy day, Maric?” And he glares at her In courtship. “Johnny, I adore your ness! Your clothes are always clean and fresh. And your face and hai make one think you are alway’s just from the barber's. Things like that make me want to love you.” And she slips an arm around his neck and strokes his hair. In wedlock. “ John, for goodness’ sake, tidy yourself up a little! Haven't you a vestige of pride in your appearance? Really, I’m ashamed of you if anybody steps in the house.” And she hands him comb, brush and whiskbroom, In courtship. “Marie, do you know I think you have the sweetest voice! I could sit all day and listen to what you say.” And he settles back blissfully in the depths of his armchair. In wedlock. ‘For the love of Mike, can’t you stop talking long enough to let me finish this paper! You chatter all day; your voice is so shrill and piercing it gets on a man’s nerves.” And he chews the end of his cigar, rustles the news- paper and shifts about irritably in his chair. In courtship. “I am so glad, honey, that you are so big and stron, Tall men are noble men; what bliss it will be to lean on your kindly strength and protec tion.” And with a little sigh of content she nestles her head against his mighty breast In wedlock. “Oh, you haven't got the tiniest bit of understanding and sym pathy for a woman! You men are just wl brutes, that’s what you ! Big strong, stupid brutes!” And she pushes him away and runs to the kitchen, sob- hing hysterically. Kansas City Times, Her Exact) Words—Bili—So you ked the sweet little thing to m yous Gill—Ves, 1 did “And she ‘ I suppose?” No, she didn’t “Oh, she said * “Not exactly “Well, what did she say, then?” “She said, ‘Nothin’doin’.’ Yonkers Statesm 1 she? n Hensforth “WHAT KIND OF HENS CAN THEY BE THAT LAY EGGS COSTING TWENTY CENTS APtECE?” “On, IF MUST BE THEM FANCY BLUE- RIBBON HENS-DE-LOOKS.”"—Le Journal Amu sant (P Not Entirely Lost—Flut/ When your wife loses her temper, where does it go? Bensonhurst—Oh, 1 usually get it. Yonkers Statesman, Nothing to It—“ Tell ‘em nothing, ch? What about that advice in managing wives?” “It won't work. What vou fail to tell "em, they guess." —L Journal, nisville Courier (armless Lady—She (pouting) And just think, you used to call me your Venus de Milo He—I was away off. A Venus de Milo could never go through her husband's pockets.—Boston Transcript Concent pn—" AIL the country people are said to be crowding into the big cities.”” “Yes,” answered the grizzled moun taineer, “even the moonshiners.”—Wash:- ton Star. Oh, Ye Men!—There are some things that a woman finds hard to forgive in her liege lord and master, and this Recently a husband in this city, whose record showed thirty years of married life with his one and only wife, came home, and, after looking at her intently was heard to murmur, “ BL “What did you say?” above-mentioned wife “Oh, nothing in particular,” he re- plied, “but IT saw an old friend today, you never met him; he stopped off be- tween trains; and he wanted to know all about you; how you looked, even the on inquired the color of your eyes, and blamed if I could remember. I told him brown.” — Detroit Free Press. comicbooks.com