Judge, 1921-03-19 · page 21 of 36
Judge — March 19, 1921 — page 21: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical pieces about early cinema: **"The Female of the Species"** (top) mocks Hollywood's formulaic filmmaking. A director describes a plot combining every trendy element: poor honest hero, rich villain, racing cars, Hawaiian scenes, volcano drama, and bathing girls—all tied together with a dramatic title borrowed from Kipling's poem about female lethality. The satire's point: the title has *nothing to do with the actual story*, yet the director doesn't care. He prioritizes spectacle, romance, and audience manipulation over coherent narrative. **"The Practical Prune"** (bottom) is a humorous poem about a couple at the movies. The woman must initiate hand-holding since the man is too timid, but when she finally gets his attention, he uses the moment to steal her wristwatch—a joke about male dishonesty disguised as romance. Both pieces critique early cinema's vapidity and the gap between artistic pretense and commercial cynicism.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
s~ Drawn by Lee Boro, University of Michigan, “ —an’ says To nist “No since! [won't Niven worx ror $5.4 DAY. Mer wirk C'S MAKE MORE THAN THAT A-TARIN’ IN WASHIN’ “The Female of the Species" “THATS a bully title,” said the director as he gazed u which I had hopefully handed ‘The Fe 3 nale o the scenario the Specie Short. snappy, and suggestive—got to have this sex stuff nowadays. Um— let's see: Jack, the hero, a poor but honest knight of the road. That's good too, this downtrodden poor stuff gets over great. Res cues beautiful girl in racing automobile from the clutch of villainous millionaire—fine! Asks her to marry him—of course—she puts up her nose and drives off. We'll put in unrequited love’ as a sub-heading. Jack meets her again in Hawaii—chance for some hula-hula and bathing-girl scenes—got to have those you know. Scene on the crater of the volcano, nefarious millionaire attempts to take girl in his arms. Hero turns up in time to interfere. after breathless climb up sides of volcano, desperate fight with the villain on the rim, the Villain gets the upper hand, the girl hits the villain with a pick-handle, he falls. Sub- tide: “The female of the species is more deadly than the male.”” Girl bends over hero, he opens his eyes. ‘Darling!’ ‘I am yourst” The final clinch. Great! | Won- derful!” said the director teaching for bis check book. “Ol course you understand that the title Drawn by Au Bexvixen, Unieersity of Pennsyleania, ‘22 Buaninc tue Mipsicut Ow 2 has nothing to do with the story,” I said, “and of course there is no plot to the thing.” “Very unnecessary my boy,” said the director handing me a check for $ ‘good title, handsome hero, beautiful heroine, thrilling scenes, y of heart-throbs, bathing-girls, and mushy sub-titles. "Shake well, and ; the public eats it eat thing. the movies! Good d. —Epwtn R. Crarr, Stanford. The Practical Prune By Avexanver C. Gwys, Pennsyloania, ‘21 HEY had been sitting in the movies For two long bours; And it was nearly time for ‘The final clinch, And yet he had’ not once ‘Tried to Hokd her hand. And so it was she who had to Let her hand slip over ‘To where it belonged, Which puzzled him Perplexedly For quite a while. But at last he saw it all And then he took her hand in his And deftly Wound her wrist-watch!