Judge, 1921-02-12 · page 6 of 32
Judge — February 12, 1921 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "Judge" Page Analysis This page contains a humorous short story titled "A Good Judge of Home Brew" rather than political satire. The narrative describes a character named Smith who visits someone's home carrying a live guinea pig in his pocket. The story satirizes Smith's thoughtlessness as a guest—he's described as a "bounder" (a rude, disreputable person) for this bizarre behavior. The accompanying illustration depicts a domestic scene where Smith sits reading while a woman stands nearby, presumably discovering his inappropriate guest. The humor targets **social etiquette violations and poor behavior among men**. The caption at bottom, mentioning "old magazines" and "liquor advertisements," suggests this is satirizing common household guest misbehavior of the era—the guinea pig being an absurdly specific example of inconsiderate conduct.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Goov Juper or Hoar Brew I could see his face light up, but there was no way out, so I The Particular Moment led the way down, opening up the corkscrew on my watch-chain “When were you most disgusted with yourself?” as I went. Reaching back into the coal-bin, I pulled out a “Well, Lonce sat in the gallery and watched the waiter 1 had bottle, opened it, and poured out two good snifters. Smith took tipped occupy a box.” his and started up the steps. “Where are you going?” I asked. Sweet Forgiveness Want to see the time ar, I’m sorry we quarreled this morning. Will you “Here's my watch,” I began, but Smith was already in the me?’ hall, so I followed as soon as I had emptied my glass. “Where are you telephoning from?” Smith was fumbling with his overcoat, and suddenly turned “4 jewelry store.” with a live guinea-pig wriggling in his hand, for all the world “Ves, 1 forgive you.” like one of those blame+ “What the “Sorry, old man,” answered Smith, “but voi njuror chaps. know what some of these bootleggers are. Now if I put a drop on this cavy’s tongue and it doesn’t turn up its toes, then the stuff is safe for me to drink Smith,” I hotly replied. “a man’s private stock, like Cawsar’s wife, should be above reproach. Leave my house! Smith set down his untasted glass, put his in fernal guinea-pig back in his pocket, and slunk out As the door closed, I picked up Smith’s drink and tossed it off. If a sample hadn't killed the vil- lage cop, whom I could see outside the barber-shop across the way, it wouldn't kill me. What a bounder that fellow Smith was! Ac- tually carrying li tinea-pigs into his host’s home to test his host's liquor! So I mused as I hurried to catch the Railhurst semi-express home the following evening. Most insulting thing I ever he: of. Oh, tonight's that poker party at Brown's. Nice fellow, Brown, very. But careless about things. Very careless. Somehow I found myself in front of a pet animal shop. “T want to get a guinea-pig as a playmate for my little boy,” I told the attendant “Yes, sir; yes, sir; here’s one that knows more about hootch than a revenue agent.” answered the man with a familiar grin. I ignored his offensive manner, paid him, and put the guinea-pig in my overcoat pocket with as much dignity as possible. Brown is a good scout, pr man can’t be too careful, you know. “READING THE LIQUOR ADVERTISEMENTS.” ~~ by Noman Axtnosy on a”