Judge — May 1, 1920 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Drawn by Cason» Youso Professor's Wife—You're a fine one! Three degrees for Scientific Research, and you can’t find a flat! You were framed! No— Groxce—It must have been a mistake! Popp—Lucky I wasn’t hung after being framed! that’s a poor joke. I wasn’t framed. I am—guilty. Grorce—Good Grivy! Popp—You remember the day I didn’t come home? You sent me out to get the sliced salmon for supper. I never went to the delicatessen! Groxce—Dad! Popp—Listen! You know how the government gradually made sugar harder and harder to get? How,sugar prohibition was made law in 1923? Grorcr—Yes, a great curse was lifted from our fair country—one after another have the evils of our democracy been wiped out by our beloved lawmakers. We are now justly the Purified States of America! Popp—Hear me out! No one had seen sugar for a twelve- month. It was almost a myth. But I was unregenerate! Your father still had the accursed craving for a bit of sugar! Grorce—Oh, no! What are you saying? Are you mad? Popp— Patience and charity, son! I went to see my old friend George Abdomen. We often been mistaken for each other on account of the similarity of our names. I went to his apartment. I knew I was doing wrong. I couldn't re- sist!’ George had six lumps of sugar which he had hidden in an old kit bag, and we each ate three. Grorce—Father! I cannot believe it! Popp—It is true! It was wonderful, the feeling of good- fellowship that came over us! We saw virtues in each other that did not exist before. We sang old college songs as we nibbled the sugar in his coat closet. It may be terrible for me to say so, but it was almost worth it—the shame that followed. Grorce— No, no! Popp—I left the apartment later, and I suppose I must have reeled slightly as I walked back. A revenue officer pounced on me from behind an ash barrel. He took me to the examining room at the federal headquarters, and put me under the fluoro- scope—~ Grorce—I am going mad! Mother—— Popp—Hear me out, son! There, like a tiny mov- ing picture, the workings of my stomach showed on the ground glass. The horror of it! The sugar was fer- menting and turning into alcohol right under the eyes of the authorities! I was-of course -convicted— they had me cold! I was sent to prison to serve seventeen years. I escaped yesterday. I had to see Mother and you Grorce— (coldly) You have scen-me. Mother you shall not see! Popp— Have mercy, my son! Grorce—I have! That is why I say you must not see Mother. If she knew what you had done it would be her end, and then you would have her death on your conscience beside—what lies already there! Popp— Let me stay— on any term My love for you both is the only thing 1n my life! me any terms! I will stay under an assumed name—I will slave for you both. I will be your servant! Grorce—(looking up with a glad smile) It may be wrong. I would be harboring a criminal. But to have a servant these days! The shame of a convicted father would more than be offset by the pride we should. have in possessing a servant when servants have been extinct for years! It is poctical justice. Father— I mean Podd! I shall call you Podd! Popp—O, my son: You are more than merciful! Grorcre— (holding Podd at arms’ length) You forget yourself, Podd. You may empty the scrap basket. Podd. Popp— (lifting up scrap basket obediently) Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. (Curtatn) Prospective Fortune “Gabe Giggery and Zeke Yawkey dug out of the creek bank tuther day what ‘pears to be a petrified lady.” related Gap Johnson, of Rum- pus Ridge, Ark. “That’s funny,” TY. + returned an ac- jhe foe” quaintance. “1 7 hain’t hecred of no lady rambling off * and getting petri- fied, have you?” “Nope! Prob’ly this special lady got petrified before ourtime. But.any- how, they expect to makea good deal of money in the op’ry business, showing her around at the county fairs in a tent.”” Serpent's Tooth Hewitt—What is platonic __ friend- ship? Jewett—It is the excuse which aman has for not paying a woman’s bills, Drown by R. B, Pouce Wuen Saura Sampceo His Home- Mave Brew on THE Roor comicbooks.com