Judge — April 10, 1920 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

TS nw Something Missing—A city young: ster was paying his first visit to his uncle's farm vong the animals on the place was a rather small colt As the boy stood gazing at the little creature, his “Well, what do you think of him, Johnny?” Why why, he’s all) right,” said Johnny; “but where's his rockers?” Boston Transcript. Question—"They say now that ther must be a law passed for the arrest of parlor bolshevists.” “Who's to do the arresting—the kitchen police?”—Wichita Eagle uncle Her Monicker—The Caller—Are you known as Mrs. Freemeter, your hu pen name? The Poet's Wife—No, Um known Mrs. Smith; that’s my washtub namc Houston Post und’s A Rural Humorist—* Does your new Eugenics—“What do you think of farm hand give satisfaction?” anyway?” asked Smith “A certain amount of it,” answered old replied Jones. “Iam six feet vunfude Mr. Cobbles tall, weigh 200 pounds and have never Pr How s that? been arrested. And my parents were We Well, he's an amusin’ cuss an’ tells never registered in a Herd Book aneat ceil and «funny story about as well as anybody Cincinnati Enquirer ndicate.”"—O R a Vitoria (Mila I ever listened to, but ['m runnin’ a farm and not one of them lecture bureaus, so for the I guess Pl have to let him go.” —Birmi Star. ham Age- Herald A Close Student—"You say he is wits lo ell-known anatomist?” fish. Washing: 'Yes,"" Is he regarded as an authority? “L'll say so. He has a front row x the first night of every vaudeville per formance.” — Houston Chronicle In the Palace of Boobs That Nevada Trick —Churihi—"'1 un- derstand that the average square mik in New York City has living in it nearly 4S many persons as are in the whole State of Nevada.” Gothamr es, but what [don’t ure derstand is why a person in the average square mile in New York has to go to Nevada to get a divorce.” — Yonkers Statesman Just Like Her— Me (admiring vase of tlowers) —Are they not beautiful? Do you know they remind me of you? She—But they are artificial He—Ah, yes, but you'd never know it Boston Transcript. Horse Sense—" How did Blank lose the fingers of his right hand?” “Put them in the horse’s mouth to sec how many teeth he had.” “And then what happened?" “The horse closed his mouth to see how many fingers Blank had.”’—London Tit-Bits "i Pessimism—There is a natural aver- sion to seeing any creature contented and happy. A man who goes fishing seldom does so because he is hungry. All he Yankee nil