Judge — April 3, 1920 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Dru by Cu cnres Wiocwr “Tur Last Rose or Suamer”—A Frowek or Oruek Days Now, Altogether! “Rah! Rah! I. B. O. S. M!” By Berton Braney AIRMIELY T believe that one of the greatest ink tions to. progress the fear of making scenes Because of that fear we endure ills that we have ho reason to endure, we accept insults and effronter with monotonous and dreary regularity, hardships that are un ry and ridicul I should like to organize an Internati hood of Scene Mak Its slogan should: be omething—and Finish It.” The scope for its opera ions would be infinite | think the first attack would be uj The Brotherhood would begin by wrestlin staurant with hat-check boys. It would be a rule invio ld alle organization that no mber herself to be divested row. And that raw would of y or the member was exhausted Then the members. wou asked if they h and stentorous “No, what of lied that all his tables were taken, thes hit » over that advance upon the head bles. Be a reservation wayman away fron would demand by main force, if necessa list with meticulous care bona fide. If any of see if all the names were rem looked phony, they woul tification of the for a certificat iling to receive o the check- the reserved v aces. Fa it, t the head waiter i room, march to a convenient table, t wn ¢ supposedly ey would thr card on the floor and s At any cost they would retain those places until the police ousted them—and this would happen only once in twenty times, because most of such reservations are merely the false barrier erected to bring about bribery The members of the brotherhood would, when a waiter arrived, courteously give their order and wait a reasonable time for it to be brought. If it did not come in that time—-and it rarely di they would rudels bang on the plates with their knives and demand service. “They would insist that what they properly put before them, and that what was properly put before them was rightly prepared by the standards the menu prices had established They would make a scene about it if correct detail was lacking. And when the coffee and cigarettes arrived, eventually; they would linger comfortably over them. When the waiter deposited the check before them, they would let it lay and continue their cc versation. If the servitor began to hover about a brush imaginary crumbs away, or whisk ash-trays off at the least pause in their use, the members of the Brotherhood would advise the waiter to find comfortable spot to stand—say fifty feet aw and tell him to stay there until he was t was alled to return. They would conclude their conversation, add uy the check, make another scene if it was not correct, call the waiter, fee him adequately but not extray and if he neglected a courteous “Th sand march out. ‘They or cabaret their cha ch x however guised. Ifthey had failed 10 keep the wraps away fr the t checke they ould Ww them on leisurely, the check- cee adjer then SMM A) VERY DRY as carefully as the wished, and the would then go 0} out with no further financial transac- ons. If mutter- ings and growl lowed them, they would turn swiftls about and chok w hat boys death But restaurants are but one pc attack. The Broth- erhood would be petty or grand lar- every la rudeness or inso- lence offered them They would have manner of courtl courtesy at the be- yning of each otiation, they would give ever opportunity for hotel clerks, box office clerks, taxi 1h ne 3 comicbooks.com