Judge — January 10, 1920 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Unbelievable—* Mr. Gadspur extols the advantage of a college education.” “ And no wonder.” “Why?” “His son spent four years at college without becoming engaged to a chorus girl or learning how to play the ukulele.” —Birmingham Age- Herald. Robes of State har jeg faat Flos ao en az med Silkefor ao en Utenriksminister, cstae en Kammerkerre og Sko az Greo Wedel, endda er jeg ikke Kar om at Ligne en Dip- nat.”” have the coat of a former Minister of State, the top-hat of a former ambassador, the vest of a chamberlain and the shoes of Wedel. Yet they say I don’t look like (Christiania). Union and Liberty AF “dors, cous cous intévesse Pas précisément, mais si elle se maria elle emporterait son piano.” “So you are interested in seeing your neighbor's daughter married o} “In a way—_If she gets married she Amusant (Paris) Aroused at Last—“I presume Pro- fessor Diggs is still writing papers on Egyptology?” No; a great light has broken on the professor.”” “How so?” “He has discovered that the high cost of living means more to him just now than anything the ancient Egyptians ever did, and he’s writing letters to the local papers on profiteers, that are masterpieces of fiery invective.” — Birmingham Herald. Wasted Effort—So many are taking up Spanish nowadays—“in a serious way as Hermione puts it—that the Woman was much interested in hearing her fellow bus riders—two young women —discuss the matter. “Yes,” said the pretty one, “I thought that Spanish would help me in my work, so I decided to join the class that was being formed in the office. But I’m sure that I shall never, never be able to learn the language! “Why not?” asked her plain com- panion. “Oh, I find it altogether too hard!” “How long have you been studying ite” “We began last night.” York Evening Sun. New York His Burden—“ Now if you could just hit it right by composing the words for a popular song,” urged his friend, “you might get independently rich.” “T know it,” he groaned, “but, alas, I am educated.”’— Portland Oregonian, Triolet on the A-String—(To the eminent violinists, Mischa Elman, Jascha Heifetz, Sascha Jacobson and Toscha Seidle.) Mischa, Jascha, Sascha, Toscha Where do fiddlers get their names? Never Abe nor Pat nor Moshe— Mischa, Jascha, Sascha, Toscha, Might sound good in Frog or Boche; a Plain guy knows them all as James Mischa, Jascha, Sascha, Toscha— Where do fiddlers get their name? —Melchizedek in Cleveland Plain Dealer. Sounds of Tumult—* What is your objection to a typically Wagnerian opera?” “The war's over, isn’t it “Yes.” “Well, I don’t want to hear anything that reminds me of a fight.” —WWashing. ton Star. Poker Lingo—I see that Mistress Mary Garden has been engaged for the principal part in “The Love of Three Kings.” Sounds as if the national game has been set to music. As these are flush times, it’s probable that the opera will open with a full house, draw well there- after and that Mary will get man: hand. It’s your deal.—Bugalo comicbooks.com