Judge — December 20, 1919 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ERS A Watery Wave—A small Glenwood avenue boy came into the house crying. “What's wro.g, son?” his mother asked, “A man said a t | “He surely didn’t swear at you “Yes, ma’am.” “Why in the world did he do that?” “T waved my hand at him.” H “Waved your hand at him?” “Yes, ma’am, but I forgot and waved the hand I was holding a snowball with.” —Voungstown Telegram. The Awful Come-down Oru Not Reducing—Mrs. Bascom was buying some lard at the meat counter Her little boy was outside waiting for her. A neighbor lady came by and asked the boy: “Where's your maw?” “She's in th’ store getting’ fat.”— Philadelphia Ledger. Just an Accident—“ Why, Johnny, you've got a lump on your head. Have you been fighting again?” “Fightin’? Not me!” But somebody struck you?” “Nobody struck I wasn’t fightin’ at all, It was an accident.” “An accident?” “Yes. [was sitting on top of Tommy Scanlan, and I forgot to hold his feet.”"— Dallas News. 20 A Trifle in the Old Days—* One dol lar for a drink of grape juice, Sam?” said the patron of a fashionable restaurant to his favorite waiter “That's correct, sir. And the cover charge will be one dollar.” “Phew! [thought prohibition would help me to save money.” “That's for you to judge, sir. But if I may say so. sir, many’s the time you've handed me a dollar just for serving the second cocktail a little bit faster than I mingham Age- served the first one.”"—Bi Herald Rechristening Demanded — “And they call that stuff. moonshine!” ex- claimed the man who was more inquisitive than wise That's the name it goes by in these hills.” “You ought to rechristen it. It tastes like bottled — sunstroke.”—Washingeon Star Their Proper Place says that prohibition has emptied our his paper That leaves plenty of room for the profiteers."—Boston Transcript. Recalling the Past—" What are you reading there?” “A handbook on golf, published some answered Mr. Jagsby “You seem interest I didn’t know you played the game.” I don’t. There are six full-page ad- vertisements of Scotch whisky in the back of this book.”"—Birmingham Age- Herald. The Undefeated Office Boy “But } attend your grandn “Yes, sir, she came that time, str.”— ear being buried alive ney Bulletin comichooks.com