Judge — November 29, 1919 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Sheik All-Soran's Royal Baker, Struck for twenty times his pay, Marched towards the Palace howling, “IT demand a four-hour day!” When he reached the Royal Presence. Spake the monarch, “Man of Buns Re this Strike, there is a para, In our Legal Code, which runs “Striking is an Art permitted To one Subject, but no more ‘Tis the Royal Headsman, standing Just behind thee; au revoir!” -Bystander, London What She Desired—“Why, Norah,” said her mistress, “how nice you look in your new dress and hat. I hope you will meet all your friends this after- noon so that they may see you in your fine clothe: “Me friends, mum?” returned Norah, “What'll I be wantin’ to see them for? Sure, I don’t care to make me friends jealous. It's me enemies I want to meet when I'm dressed up."—Boston Tran- script. Cause For Alarm—‘Marie, who was that man I saw you talking to at the front gate this morring? “Why—er—Mr. Grumpit. That was one of my suitors. He was asking me to go to the ‘Sons of Jupiter’ ball on my next night out.” “I beg your pardon, Marie. I didn't mean to pry into your affairs, but I was afraid he might be a walking dele- gate of the Housemaids’ union who was hanging around here trying to get you to strike."—Birmingham Age-Herald. A Sleeper—The Boss—All we have for you % a job as night watchman. How soon can you come to work at it? Mr. Torposon—Just as soon as I can go home and get my pajamas.— Boston Globe. Conditional—"“But we simply must have a cook!” wailed Mrs, Newlywed tearfully. “I've never lived in a house without one.” “Well, if it’s as bad as that, mum, I'll come,” replied the hesitating candidate. “I don't mind staying so long as I don't have to do any of the cooking.”—New York Evening Post. Not Her Hour—New Cook—Phwat toime do yez have breakfast? Mistress—At 7:30. Cook—Well, Oi'm sorry Oi can’t be wid ye—Boston Transcript Pa’s Answer—“What is a servant, p: “Ours is. She has worked for every- body in the community.”—Boston Globe. public The Noiseless Tread—Two young employes in a big London shop, who are supposed to be busily employed in the rear of the establishment while the principal looks after things in the front, were recently startled by the appear- ance of their employer while they were engrossed in a game of draughts. The proprietor was justly indignant. “How is it,” he declared, “that I scarcely ever 2 find you fellows at work when I come out here?” “Well, sir, I'll tell you,” volunteered one of the youths. “It's on account of those rubber heels that you wear!” Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph. The Maids One by one they come and go Thin, sebaceous, nimble, slow ; Every hue and every. style, Come to visit us a while; Come to bring us some new sorrow, Here today and gone tomorrow. When you think that one is true, She has beat it P. D. Q. One by one they come and go, Ain't it so? One by one, an endless string, Summer, autumn, winter, spring, Minnie, Mabel, Hilda, Sue, Bridget, Carrie, Lil Now and then a prize appears (Once in every hundred years); But, alas, they never stay, Neighbors lure them kind away, Curse the fiends who stoop to such, We have never done it (much) But the good ones they are few, Ain’t it true? —Chicago Tribune. Pat Example—Teecher—Give me an example of incongruity. Smart Stu A divorce lawyer hum- ming the March. — Boston Transcript, Wedding Preparedness—"“What is prepared- nes: “Knitting sweaters for soldiers of the next war.”—Detroit News. Ach Vater! Thar & then Stork, som kommt mit Judebarn.” “Papa, is that the stork which brings the Jewish babies?"—Vikingen (Chris- tiana). comichooks.