Judge, 1919-11-15 · page 8 of 36
Judge — November 15, 1919 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains satirical commentary on literary inspiration and several comic vignettes. The top illustration by R.B. Fuller depicts construction workers and references the cliché that artists need specific conditions—the text mocks Tolstoy's supposed need to dress as a peasant with a ham sandwich to write. The lengthy prose section ridicules the notion that modern "inspiration" is merely imitation. It sardonically suggests readers wanting to write poetry should simply copy Swinburne, or study established masters (Milton, Hugo, Zola, Dreiser) rather than develop original ideas. The joke: there's "nothing new to be said"—only new ways of saying old things. At $1.50, inspiration is now a commercial commodity available at public libraries. The lower section contains three brief humor pieces: "Fifty-fifty" jokes about divided attention; "Time Enough Yet" plays on lowered expectations of neighbors; and "Oh, Fudge!" makes a pun about Blondel "sawing" violin strings. The final cartoon by C.D. Small shows an absurdist joke: Mr. Potato (anthropomorphized vegetable) wants optical fitting—a nonsense gag typical of Judge's whimsical humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Drawn by RB Furrer Old Timer (to green workman) — th’ rope to bust when there ain't one Tolstoi could do nothing unless dressed like a peas- ant with a ham sandwich in his pocket And so on, It is all sacred. He jests at genius who never had a scorned manuscript returned! Inspiration, in these hustling days, i reading. A plastic, impressionable, -it-in imagina- tion can turn out anything by a process of vi creation. There are no ideas; there is only There is nothing new to be said; but there is an original way of saying so. If you want to write free verse take a header into ‘i s of Grass” for an hour or two. If you want to do some high-diving blank verse read “Paradise Lost.” If you want to do a legend read William Morris. If you want to do an editorial in great primer read “Toilers of the Sea,” by Victor Hugo. If you want to write a book of epigrams buy one. If you want to exude a great psychological novel read Paul Bourget. If you want to get into the courts study Zola and Theodore Dreiser. a matter of 11-15-19) at all them idiots watchin’ fer yance in ten of its happenin’ lf you want to do a great lyrical poem take four stanzas of Swinburne twice every hour. If you want to do the prophet stuff read the Bible. Today inspiration comes at $1.50 Everybody is inspired. The god for the asking—in the Public Library Whatever is is right, said Alexander Pope. Today he would say, whatever is is rewrite. Pegasus? The Divine Aflatus? Go to! Nothing to it! Give us some one else’s style and we can move the planet. Fifty-fifty Junior Proprictor—The bookkeeper’s atten- tion is about evenly divided between the pretty stenographer and the clock, it seems to me. Senior Proprietor (comparing clock with watch)—Well, both are a little fast. net Time Enough Yet Wife—I am afraid that I'm not going to like our new neighbors. Husband—Well, my dear, I shouldn't worry yet awhile. They may be people who do not want to be liked. Oh, Fudge! “King Richard was helped to escape from a donjon cell by Blondel, a minstrel.” “History fails to state. I s'pose Blondel got his violin and sawed off a few bars.” Mental Makeup The man who can’t make up his mind whether to marry or not usually lets the weary ! woman decide for him. Willie Bug (clerk in Bugtown's optical shop)—Hey, Mr Bug! Hurry up! Mr, Potato wants to have all his’ eyes examined and fitted with tortoise-shell glasses!