Judge — September 20, 1919 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Madame La Boss By Bexyasux De Cassexes s [ook all around you, gentle- men,” said Bunk, who was giving a little private blow-out to his two friends, “and you will see that Iam the master of most things here on earth. My editorials create public opinion, my diplomat- ists engineer wars with phrase: and my profiteers invent foun dations for universal educa- tion; in fact, I— “Nonsense, Bunk,” said Common Sense, measuring out his words, so as to be careful not to spill a thought, “any- body can see through you. The ultimate power of all social progress resides in me. My proverbs are in every almanac I dig subways, build bridges, and keep down the dea You create motion—a simple thing—but I make people happy and keep them sane.”” “Neither of you would exist if it were not for my imagina- tion!” exclaimed the Poet, pour- ing out his tenth glass. “‘ First comes the Poet with his dreams. Bunk mints them into currency, and Common Sense turns them into tools. The world builds statues to me, but where are Drown by T. 8. Tocser the statues to Bunk and Pronipition Reacnes Woopvitte Common Sense?” Just then the butler announced the arrival of Madame Eve A Reasonable Guess and her daughters, and the three rulers of the world rose and “Say, Doc!” saluted Mr. Gap Johnson, of Rumpus Ridge, bowed to the ground. Ark., upon encountering Dr. Hackaway in the highroad, “my least boy, Bearcat, four years old, is punying around the most of the time. For one thing, he didn’t eat much, which is a mighty serious sign, or was, when I was a boy. Do you reckon the little cuss ort to stop smoking?” Effective “Congress ought to enact more restrictive immigration _ legisla- tion.” “What can be more restric- tive of immigration than the bone-dry law?” Qualified “That man over there has written a poem a day for five years. Isn’t that a remarkable achievement?” “Yes, it is if he has remained Drawn by Pact Reur Tue See SERPENT a poet.”