Judge — July 26, 1919 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

—— | THE OLD SOD Conscientious A big Irishman while carrying # ladder through a crowded street, had the to break a plate-gla He im mediately dropped bis ladder and broke but he had been seen by the after him in misfortune window in a store into a run shopkeeper. who dashed company with several salesmen, and was soon caught “Here. you big loafer! angry shopkeeper.,when he had regained his breath You have broken my window!” I sure have.” admitted the Celt, “and didn't you see me running home to get the Harper's Ma shouted the money to pay for it Finnegan. a rail “On again Country! gh not he « returned to Ireland re On being questioned Some road worker. thou; off again” fame cently on a visit by his relatives concerning the of America, he described its size Phwy, An to drerag | wonders fol lows T-r-ric so big tho: if ye wor ind throug’) lave a mar rk in Oireland in inland the Shtates ve wouldn't th’ di n° ve could lose thim gr-great we call lakes get rid of there are un’ if oceans We ye had Scotland t th di carners to hide her in were ve'd put her, ex an’ no body cow the strong smell ay cept. begorra 3 Transcript whiskey Simple Logic —An Lrishman was before a ma, stra’ brougt ye and qu charge of vag “What trade are “Your h You in the sea tion whether you have ever been to sea in your life Shure. now think I came over from Ireland ina waggin?""—Blighty (London you in? ior. a sailor ng line? L ques and does your honor Up Against It -One day when Matt Wynne, the manager of Church ill Downs Land atonia, was at the Juarez track he was braced for a litth coin by a man who looked like a Mex ican but talked like an Irishman “Are vou an Irishman or a Mexi- n?” asked Matt Will, sor.” was the reply. Pm both Me name is Patrick O'Driscoll Valdez yugh Oirish in me to make e, sir, an’ > get licked Enquirer Thave juste me want to fight all the ist enough Mexican in me “—Cincin et Just WORDS a Reminder Thankful “What's: Bolshevisis’”” Folk that start fires! Then never be thank vin idness rif there's startin A Little Doubt My Jobn'll 2 oman wha the tire, it's Mnemotechnics— \ farmer ran into drug:store much upset My wife told me to get something here I have forgotten what it is ¢ Not unless vou tell me something more about it Farmer—Well, it’s for pain Druggist—Aspirin, cocaine, aconite? Farmer—No, no, th it, it’s something th t don’t sound like sounds prettier Druggist—Sorry, but 1 can’t do any thing for vou Farmer—Ves, you can Druggist—Well, how? Farmer—V'll tell, you Great Lakes for me I don’t quite see the con Ontario, name the Druggist nection, but I aim to please. Vhe farmer shook his head Druggist—Huron gan More shakings of the head. Erie,” said the druggist The fermer’s face — brightened That's it. Wasn't there a famous sailor who won a battle there?" Druggist—Perry, you mean? Farmer—Now you got it. Give me a dime’s worth of perrygoric for the Journal of the Americ Michi Superior old woman Medical Issocia The Wrong Guess—" What is the meaning of ‘false doctrine,’ Willie?” asked the Sunday-school teacher “It's when the doctor gives the wrong stuff to a sick man,” replied Willie. Pearson's Weekly comicbooks.com