Judge — July 26, 1919 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Flight That Failed “I'd like to offer you some sce “Thanks awfully. But as I'm nidst of worki nind obli the scene just now, would m them in the waste basket 1 le Courier Paris). Needed Help—Rather pretty young woman and small son on Clifton car Gentleman sits opposite; stranger to lady and boy, but a lover of children Cultivates acquaintance of youngster by means of smiles and winks. Boy recep. tive, but has not yet acquired the art of winking with one eye—can only squint with beth eyes at once Thinks nice stranger deserves better recognition peremptorily and loudly calls on his mother for assistance. Thus: * Mamma wink at that man, I can’t!"—Cleve Plain Deater Destructive~* Why do you call your little son a ‘parlor bolshevik ’? You would understand,” 1 Mr Gadspur, “if you could see the condition of the room after he has played there about thirty minutes.""— Birmi I ge-Herald m The New Order of Things Correct—" What does a volcano do with lava?" asked Freddy “Give it up.” replied his father “That's right.” said Freddy.—Little Wanderer Precocity—It was washing day. and John had been kept from school to look after the baby. Mother sent them into the garden to play, but it was not long re cries disturbed her hn, what is the matter with b. now?" she inquired from her wash-tub. “I don't know what to do with him mother,” replied John. “He's dug a hole and wants to bring it into the house.” London Tit-Bits A Ready Explainer——" Tommy. your head is wet. You've been in swimming against my orders.” “No, pa. I was just standin’ on the bank watchin’ the other boys when that little Tompkins kid did a ‘belly-bu an’ splashed me.” ster “Then, why wasn’t your hat wet?” “Thad it in my hand, pa, fannin’ my- self Umph! I guess I'll lawyer out of you, son 1ee-Herald. Birmingham Pie-bald Truth—Mr. Jones keeps ons, and Mr. Brown, next door, tries eons. Mr. Frown is con stantly losing birds, while Mr. Jones is as constantly suspected of finding them. The other morning Mr. Brown, with a smile and a sixpence, approached the youthful son and heir of Mr. Jones. “Willie.” began Brown, holding up the coin, “did daddie find a bird yester- day?” Willie nodded “And was it a blue bird with some white feathers in its wing?” *Dunno,” responded Willie, pocketing the sixpence. can't tell their color when they're in a pie!" —London Tit-Bits pig to keen pi 22 Troublemakers—The club manager appeared to be greatly excited “Hey, you.” he called to the ground keeper. “come here a minute.’ The groundkeeper came “When any more girls want to walk on the golf links search them first The groundkeeper stood aghast “But I couldn't do that. sir.” he protested “Well, don’t let them take any bags or packages onto the links.” “Yes, sir, but “No ‘buts’ about it. Y you your salary u know who yn't you?” “Well, this morning a lot of girls walked all over the links and they spilled candies all over the place.” "Yes—” “One of the most influential club mem bers, who happens to be a tritle near sighted, lost his temper nine times and broke three golf sticks swatting at marsh mallows.”—Voungstown Telegram One Way to Be Happy" They seem to get along very well.” “Yes. She makes her pli they interfere as little as possible with her husband's golf engagements.""— Detroit Free Press. s so that A New Type—“He’s « golt bolshe vist.” “What's a golf bolshevist? “One who can’t get any fun out of the game because the other fellow plays it better than he."—Detroit Free An Innovation in Paris Ag comicbooks.com