Judge — July 26, 1919 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Dutch Pessimism Too Much Oh, Rip Van Winkle slept awhile Some twenty years or so, When he woke up he found in style Some things he didn’t know The trolley cars he stood full well, Faced autos by the score But when he struck H. C. of L. He sought the woods once more. —Kansas City Journal. The Bank In my tin bank I put a dime, And kept it there for quite a time. I let it stay a month about, And shook my bank till it fell out But when it fell upon the floor, It was a dime—and nothing more I thought, from what I heard Pop say, It would increase from day to day And so, month after month, I meant To keep my dime, and spend a cent My dime would be a kind of hen And lay a penny now and then But when I found my bank would add Nothing at all to what I had. I simply wasted no more time, But went right off and spent my dime —From Jane, Joseph and John: Their Book of Verses, by Ralph Bergengren. EDUCATION & I told vou mark this box nale with care.” What's this gibberish you've Knew Them merchant scrawled on it? “That,” replied the college grac hé Latin for *Handle with care “Huh! How do you expect a beggage man to understand that? “He won't, and therefore he won't get ton Tray mad and smash the box.” script. Father's Hope—-The son of the fam ily was home on his first vacation since he had attained to the dignity of class president. He and his father were dis g affairs of the day, and finally the boy remarked, “Say, dad, I hope when I am as old as you are I'll know more than 1 cu you “L'll go one better, my boy,” the father replied. “I hope that wher re (hat think you much as 5 ‘on Times. old you will know you do now ¢ The Sympathetic Touch—“' ho was that shabby fellow in here just now?” “That was the first honor man in my class at college,” said the capitalist. “He wanted to borrow a quarter.” “How sad?” “Oh, it might have been worse.” “Xe “He got the quarter.” Age-Herald Birmingham Germanic Ideals They say Iam afraid of work. a fine piece of work?"—Lust (Berlin). 20 The Double Jar to the fourth floor when you let r flight of stairs and stove the ght; I forvot. ‘That just pr Out of His Line—It was one of those rare occasions when Attorney Gu lost a case and he wasn’t feeling so very happy over it “Your profession doesn't make angels out of men, does it?” said a medical friend, teasingly snapped Lou, “that’s one thing eto you doctors!"”—Unitersity nsey An Expert Tip--Lawyer (to hand- some female defendant)—Sob a whole lot, but shed no tears. Nothing will prejudice a jury against you like a red nose and watery cye.—Boston Globe. Point of View —“Has our client a good case?” *Good for several thousand dollars.” —Boston Transcript. comicbooks.com