Judge — June 21, 1919 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Canine League—The dogs met in council at the Quai d'Orsay to decide what should be done about the dachs: hund. The question was whether they should give up any of their hard-carned bones to save him from Bolshevism. The Irish terrier said, “Confine him to his kennel until his distemper is over.”” The English bull said, “Let me get my teeth in his neck.”” The Scotch collie kilt.” The American fox terrier said, “He must be House-broken.”” The French poodle said, “Let him eat his Bonaparte from decent dogs.” The Russian borzoi, who was thought to be suffering from a few Bolshevik fleas himself, said, “Let him have a bone, pro bono publico.” The Italian setter said should be drowned; look of the dog that bit you The Chinese chow said, “ Mangy dogs make poor companions.” The Belgian chien de trait him wear his tail at half mastiff. The Spanish spaniel said, “There are some good kennels on Saint Hele’ The Great Dane said, “ He ought to be docked.” The Japanese pug said, “Let him be made into sausages.” The Balkan boarhound said, ought to be considered a cat.” And when the dachshund saw how they all felt about it he wagged his tail and uch a fuss about a little scrap of Philadelphia Evening Ledger. aid, “ He ought to be “His puppies ut for the heir id, “Let “He No Pampered Pet—“ You advertise dog for sale. a sensible lo you mean by a. sensible “This pup has never had a ribbon around his neck and has never ridden in a limousine since the day he was born. He's a happy-hearted, bone-burying, cat- chasing, 100 per cent. dog.”—Birming- ham Age-Herald Dogged Forbearance—‘‘The tricks that man taught his little dog re- quired a great deal of patience and kindness.” “Unquestionably,” answered Miss Cayenne. “I can’t understand what kept the little dog from biting him.”’—IWash- ington Star, Household Diplomacy maid became homesick.— don) When the ni Bystander (L A Hanger-On—“Why did you give such a ferocious bulldog as that such a sentimental name as Ivy “Because when he once attaches him- self to a person, he does cling to one so.” Baltimore American. Misunderstood—Bacon—What's that dog making such an awful noise about? Suppose he’s swallowed a bone? Egbert—No; he's probably making that because he can’t— Yonkers Statesman noise An Ohio Controversy—Personal— I will not be responsible for any debts contracted by my wife, Jennie E. Wright, on or after this date. Joun Freperick Wricnt, John Frederick Wright never has bought me any clothes, and I always pay cash. ot be responsible for any of his clothes, as | have clothed him from head to toe. Jennie E, Wricit, —Advertisement in Springfield, O., Sun His Comeback—Mrs. HMenpeck—To think that I once considered you a hero! Oh, la-la-l. Mr. Henpeck—1 suppose the thought struck you on the evening | performed the death-defying and foolhardy feat of proposing marriage to you.— Buffalo Ex- press. Wonders of Science—The young couple sat in their six-by-cight “garden.” “T sce by this medical work,” said the lady, “that a man requires cight hours’ sleep and a woman ten.” “Yes,” agreed the man; “I’ve read that somewhere myself.” “How nice!” said the lady. “You + can get up every morning and have the fire made and the breakfast ready before it is time for me to get up!"”—Minne- apolis Tribune After Demobilization “Excuse me, ma'am, but my job in the ai 2 tes d'écoute.” s posts."—Le Rire (Paris). ny was at listeni: