Judge — April 19, 1919 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Lerret—This the Gro- But It Doesn't—Mr article, Forty-Five Ways to ¢ cer’s Bill, ought to be valuable: Mrs. Lerret (sadly)—It valuable would be in- work.—Ginger In the Cofeteria—Anobbs —What are you lunching on today? Bobbs—Efiicitncy. Knobbs—Stop your kidding and ex- plain Bobhs of the Everything in one movement elbow —Hash!—JSournal of the 1 Associ n to stand pretty I'm making some progress,” said already thinks enough of me ne ne a piece of yesterday's pie Age-Merald. the Better—G those The Werse can’t guarantee madam. ¢ »mer—No matter; the neighbors when they co ing.—Boston Transcript. sixty-cent I want ’em for ie borrow No Free Feeds—Dave Lewis begs to that he has started business on his to-date pany friends will n hook as an dam give him a chance.— i hopes that his II stop away and 1 Paper Swell Manners—Some people affect to think that nice table manners of invention, and that our grand- vers were unacquainted with dainty Juct To show such ‘ong they are allow us to quote from a treasured “Inquire Within, or 3.700 Facts for the People,” published in Philadelphia in 1855: “If possible, the knife should never be put in the mouth at all; but if it is neces- ary, let the edge be turned outward. The teeth should be picked as little as possible, and never with the fork. “When napkins are provided, thi to be unfolded and laid on the Use the napkin to wipe the mouth or the fingers; never a handkerchief, or to mop the brow The “if possible” is what makes a hit with us.—Cleveland Plain Dealer. people h work, Next Year? kes him s * Milk asked That Wouldn't Be So Much in your coiee, is morn ing, sir?” the polite waiter in the big hotel “Yes, please,” replied the guest from behind his paper. “How much, sir?” “Not very much. About worth.” —Washi fifty cents’ ington Star. Appetizing Stuff—* M are the veriest shams.” “This one isn’t.” A mor so interested in sed her cu rald. her salad course 2 gham Germany's New : with this flirting business ics show that there are now eteen to every man.”—Fliegende Blatter (Berli SPINSTERS Uninviting Prospects—‘Soyou would object to marrying a man for moncy?’ Certainly, id Miss Cayenne. “Wouldn't you like a bird in a gilded cage ‘0. Too many people think that all rd in a gilded cage needs is a little food and Washin to be n occasional drink of water, gton Star. Tender-Hearted—“ And why have you never married?” asked Miss Peach “Are you a woman hater? “Oh, my, no!” replied Mr. Oldbach I hated to make about a the ppy just to make one of —Knoxville Journal and “You sce, sand girls unh them happy. Tribune Her Best Opportunity—They were entertainments of various whose plainness of discussing kinds, and one girl, feature and general air of thin old maid- ishness was very marked, said: ‘or my part, I don’t care your dances and receptions and What I like is a dinner-party.” “Mercy!” exclaimed another woman, “are you becoming a godemets Me id the old maid, “the food doesn’t matter, but it is the one time when I am sure of having a man on cither side of me who can’t get away.”—Phila- delphia North American. a rap for teas.