Judge — April 12, 1919 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

COURTING Physical Impossibility—Pater Fa- milias (sternly)—You can’t walk in this house and hang up your hat, young man. Bashful Wooer (meekly)—I know I can’t, sir. You're sitting on it. —Balti- more American. He Interested Her—“I find the pro- fessor’s statistics stupid.” “T don’t. He told me there were 400,- 000,000,000 people in the world and that I was the prettiest girl in the lot."—Stray Stories Putting the Clock Ahead—How times have changed. The old-fashioned girl who used never to sit up later than nine o'clock has a daughter now who just starts out at nine o'clock for the evening. —Boston Transcript. Looked Encouraging—“Has that young man who is calling on you given you any encouragement, Emily?” asked the father. “Oh, yes, father. Last night he asked me if you and mother were pleasant to live with,” replied the daughter. Yonkers Statesman. That's the Point—He—Shall we live with your parents after we are mar- ried? She—The question is, can we live with- cut them.—Boston Transcript. Scientific Cookery cous jugerai a Cue sauce hollandaise?” cous étes si calée, comment faites-cous [Am te citrine “Tout ce qu'il ya plus simple: C¥IO dans un litre d1PO avec (Ca et une pineée de Na Cl!” “Tl put you to the test with Hollandaise sauce?” “Quite simple. neite (Paris) Loves Labor Lost——‘What did Mr, Cummings say to you last night, Clar when he was trying to button your glove?” queried the anxious mother. “Why,” replied the daughter, “he said that any firm making gloves as hard to but- mine ought to quit the business.” ll, my dear,” continued the a. m., “take my advice and don’t waste any more time in that direction.""—Brooklyn Citizen. Customer—Who's waiting at this table? Chorus from the Counter—You are!—London Mail. If you are so accomplished, how do you make citrate of fungi C#HMOF in a quart of H?O with Ca and a pinch of Na Cl!"—La Baion- JO Disappointment—We were promised a report of two weddings for this issue, but up to this Friday noon the promised wedding notices have not arrived.—New Waterford (O.) Magnet. , A New ‘Skirt’ in Town—A new baby daughter is reported at the home of Mr. and Mrs. Peddycoat of Athens reet.”"—Mere le Banner. Alarmed Expectancy—Anne Ritten- house cordially indorses the hip-length tunic, and, inasmuch as we never yet have got it into our head whether the tunic is a waist or gown, one can imagit our trepidation as we go about our tasks.—Ohio State Journal. Why Country Editors Are Bald— Last week several items were put back owing to lack of space, and that sort of thing, which no one except those initiated quite understands. We always dislike to leave out something of which we are aware as there are always many things taking place of which we do not know or fail to get details which must per- force be unmentioned.—Oberlin (Kas.) Times. comicbooks.com