Judge — April 5, 1919 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

y SSS ee YOUNGSTERS A Lesson in Anatomy—Little Ed- mund, aged four, had been so naughty that his mother lost all patience with him and shook him hard. Instead of crying he seemed very much surprised, and spent quite a while afterward inspecting him- self in the mirror. At last he turned to his older sister and said in a puzzled tone: don’t see why I stayed whole.” “Silly,” replied his sister. ‘You can’t come apart because of your backbone. Your head sits on one end of it and you sit on the other.”’—Philadelphia North American. More Cheerful Name—Jane Ad- dams, of Hull House, said at a mother’s meeting: “How quaint the minds of children are! One New Year's Day I gave a little girl a present of a diary. “*This is a diary,’ I explained to her. ‘Every day you must write in it a record of your life, a record of how you live.’ “The little girl turned the blank pages of the book and said: “*But why isn’t it called a livery in- stead of a diary, ma'am?’ "—Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph. Prophylaxis at a Distance—A Mil- waukce boy told his teacher that his sister had the measles. “You go right home, Johnny,” she said, “and don’t come back until your sister is well.” Johnny left in a hurry. After he was gone another little boy held up his hand and said: “Teacher, Johnny Dolan’s sister what has the measles lives in Philadelphia.”"— Journal of the American Medical Associa- tion. of the Wise Child—Little Annie had been having trouble with her lessons, and had turned for assistance to her big brother. He did the sums for her, handed her the paper, and resumed his reading. She was soon back at his side, however, and he inquired: “What's the matter; aren’t they all right?” “Oh, yes, indeed. They are ever so nice; but won't you please put a few mistakes in, so that teacher will think I did it?" —Philadelphia Inquirer. A Surprise The Artist—So you liked my little picture in the exhibition? The Model—I was never so astonished in my jife as when I saw your name on it.— Sydney Bulletin. Clever Bessie—‘“The governess was awful cross today,” the children said, in the evening. “Well, mamma, maybe we were bad; but we soon pacified her. I gave her a big, rosy apple, Fanny gave her a hearty kiss and Fred gave her a promise to behave better hereafter.” “And, Bessie, what did you give her?” mamma asked, of the youngest. “1?"stammered Bessie. “I—Igave her the—the—slip.”—Philadel phia Inquirer. Worlds Hlawioe DOCTORS Change Did Him Good—Doctor— What you need most is a change of diet. Dyspeptic—Come again, Doc! Why, that’s what made me what I am today. Doctor—What do you mean? Dyspeptic—Five different cooks in as many months.—Buffalo Express. Time for a Change of Doctors?— A. A. Hawley was taken seriously ill on Friday, January 3 last, with a general breaking down of his health due to old age, being well past eighty years old. Under -the care of Dr. P. H. Sumner of Camp- town and the careful nursing of loving hands, he is gradually failing —Wya- lusing (N. Y.) Rocket. But Then—George Washington al- ways told the truth, but then no one ever asked George any of the following ques- tions: How many of your influenza cases died? Did the patient need the operation? What was your income last year? What is the real value of your personal property? Was the operation successful—for the patient? Do you always know what the drugs you prescribe will do?—Journal of the American Medical Association. At Last—The doctor coughed gravely. “Tam sorry to tell you,” he said, look- ing down at the man in the bed, “that there is no doubt you are suffering from small-pox.”” The patient turned on his pillow and looked up at his wife. “Julia,” he said, in a faint voice, “if any of my creditors call, tell them that at last I am in a position to give them something.” —Truth Seeker. comicbooks.com