Judge — January 11, 1919 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Alcohol, A Remedy for Flu { la, reas dire. Crest pas une cuite; “est un medicament.” t, dearic. ‘This isn’t a jag; it’s a —Ie Rire (Paris) all ri treatment.” TOUGH-HIDES The Unkindest Kick of All—Tailor Thought I’d met some cheeky custom. ers, but Bootmaker—What now? Tailor—I've had to press these trouse four times and they are not even paid for. Bootmaker—That’s nothing. I went to collect a bill for a pair of boots yesterday, and the fellow kicked me out with them. Chicago News. Introductory Remarks—“ Glithers said some kind things about you.” “Were they followed by an ‘if or a but “How did you guess it?” “I know Glithers. He's one of those qualifying knockers.""—Birmingham Age- Herald. YOUNG THINGS Naturally: What are we going to do when we have the girls interested in these feminine political clubs?” “Don't worry. In the nature of things, such clubs are bound to be miss-man- aged.”—Baltimore American Snubbed—" If, as the poet says, ladies’ looks are our books, will you not let me learn from your eyes?” “Thanks, but my eyes are already sup, plied with pupils.”"— Balt; Appealing to Real Influence. “What is your objection to me as a son in-law?” inquired the young man with the melancholy expression. “Who told you I didn’t like you?” asked Mr. Cumrox. “Gwendolyn.” “Clever girl. She is saying that so as to make you more popular with her mother.” —Washington Star, Watchful Painting “Oh! It's a Gift!"—Tasler (London). —Sorry, Madam, there is no room except an empty bed in our chauffeur’s bed- room Arrival: Manager—Yes, yes, but so is the chauffeur lon Opi n ir, I'm a lady! HIGH-BROWS Wool - Gathering — Barber —(about through with hair cut)—Does that suit you, sir? -lbsent-minded Professor—You've cut it altogether too short—a little longer please.—Boston Transcript. The Occult—“ The study of the occult sciences interests me very much,” re- marked the new boarder. “TI love to ex plore the dark depths of the mysterious. to delve into the regions of the unknown to fathom the unfathomable, as it were, and to—" “May I help you to some of the hash, professor?” interrupted the land- lady. And the good woman never knew why the other boarders smiled audibly.- London Opinion. comicbooks.com