Judge — August 31, 1918 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

What the Huns Thought Would Happen When Their Seventy-five-) ile Flivver-Gun Was Trained on Paris ; report: “A single shell from the Place de I’Etoile and hurled it bodily through the air, whence it finally crashed down upon the Opera think.—La Ba tte (Paris) A Defiant Ozark Editor—If you don’t take this paper, don’t take umbrage at anything it may say.—Mammoth Spring Sun. Too Much——Press Agent (earnestly) Believe me, old man Dramatic Editor (interrupting)—You are asking too much.—Buffalo Express The Usual Way—" How are we going to get any quotations out of these press notices? ked the theater's ad vertising man he most generous of them says, ‘This is not a very good show. “Well,” replied the manager, “for bill- board purposes you'll have to condense ita little.” “How? “Just leave out the word ‘not.’ Washington Star. Journaux Bocke nan super-cani Pleased, Just the Same—“ The paper states that you pleased a big audience at anquet last night.”” he paper is wrong. I did not ap pear “Um. I guess the paper is right.” Louisville Courier-Journal. Glorifying Kultur t “le char de la German idea of the Chariot of Victory on (Par! he from its foundations in the louse, a mile away”—we don’t |} CULLUD UNS | Taking It Out in Trade—A young darky in the South, who was of very limited means, took unto himself a wife. Upon the conclusion of the marriage ceremony he proffered to the minister three twenty-five-cent pieces. “Dese is about all I’s got, parson,” said he, regretfully. Then, observing « disappointed look on the face of the clergyman, he added, hastily, “But ef we has any chillun, we’: in’ to send ‘em to your Sunday-school.”—IHarper's Magazine Essential to Industry—A_ young registrant, claiming exemption sked, “How many people are dependent on you?” He replied: “Two, sah. Paw, he de pends on me to find washin’ for Maw; and Maw, she depends on me for to hunt wood- choppin’ for Paw.” —Argonaut. comicbooks.com