Judge — August 17, 1918 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

a —— 1A Digest of the Worlds Humor | DKHeWittiest Thoughts frou the Prightest Minds | JUST KIDS She Knew—*Can any member of the class tell anything about waves?” asked the pretty young school-teacher. “Yessum,” whanged little Ethel, “I can “Well, how waves are there? . “Three—ocean waves, thought waves and Marcel waves."—Florida Times- Union ny different kinds of Never—* There's one good thing about spoiled children.” “What's that?” “One never has them in one’s own house.” —Boston Transcript How to t Him In—It was the youngster’s first experience at Sunday school and he sat eagerly watching the superintendent illustrate the lesson on the board. The superintendent drew the path to heaven—one straight line—and started the figure of a man on it. Gradu- ally the man became larger and larger, and finally when he arrived at the gate of heaven he could not get in. Whereupon the superintendent turnedtohissmallau- dienceand, ina tragic and sorrowful tone, said: Yousee,heis so puffed up with sin tha he can not enter.” Try him side- ways, mister!’ called out the youngster Everybody's. TheTest—Johnny —Huh! [ bet you didn’t have a good timeat your birthday party yesterday. Willie—L bet I did. Johnny—Then why ain't yousick to-day? —Boston Transcript 50 pour rem Comb chaussures d mes sem ne prendr p n me prendrex-cou. ea? w soles on NN eee TR Oe ad me ur reme ths ago you charged me hese shoes. rge to put ne’ ya deux mois, 12 fr. chaussures. re des Now how w shoes on The Willing Button — /ndignant Mother—What on earth do you do to tons this w pur clothes to keep me sewing on but- Apologetic Son—1 don't know, mother, I merely touch the button I can’t imagine what does the rest.—The American Boy. Pride of Promotion The Sergeant Bathes—The By 7 (London). | | — ee } WIVES | Futile Pleasantry—She—I heard a noise very late when you came in He (facetiously)—Was it the night falling? She (sternly)—No; it was the day breaking.—Baltimore American. The Dreadful Difference — Jones turned up at his club some time after his marriage with such a miserable look that his friends were much alarmed. “What's the matter,”’ asked one of them. “I'm fed up,” he said. “Fed up abso- lutely. I’ve discovered since I got mar- ried that my wife can’t sing.” “Why,” said his friend, “isn’t that something to be congratulated on?” “No,” said Smith. “Unfortunately not. You see my wife thinks that she can.”"—Ideas. How She Did It—“I've cured my husband’s insomnia.” “How did you do it “Pretended I was ill and had the doc- tor prescribe medi- cine which Henry was to give me every half hour all night long.” Houston Post. Good Reason — He—And—er—why do you want to get a divorce? She—Because I'm married, of course. Cassell’s Saturday Journal. Why He Didn't— “Did you mail that letter I gave you yes- terday?”” N-no, my dear. I whistledto the manin the postal airplane, but he couldn’t cor down after it. Kansas City Journal. comicbooks.com