Judge — August 10, 1918 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Only WEARERS Know This Comfort Try a pair yourself. See how ‘lightly the patented Wide W rests on mus- Men who say other. E.Z. GARTER “THE ONE THAT WON'T BIND” DEALERS: Ask your jobber, o order sample dozens from us without obligation. | If not at dealer's. send ysc and THE THOS. P. TAYLOR CO. ILLUSTRATED | By WINFIELD SCOTT HALL, MD.PLD. | SEX FACTS MADE PLAIN | What every young man and | Every young woman should know | $1.00 “Hematite Postpaid ___ What every parent should know AMERICAN PUB. COMPANY, 809 Winston Bide., Philadelphia Cleopatra Had a Jazz Band “This harp sings that you love me,” Said Antony with desire; But the fair Cleopatra screamed in his ear “That's not a harp, sir; it’s a lyre.” unch Bort. B-r-r-r-r! | * Spreading the Alarm.” Of Course It’s a horrible mushy story Well, isn’t it a serial?—Record Salome Marie Very “She's a very high toned girl.” “Yeh, she’s a scream.""—Jack 0’ Lantern y rerything. Rat bath, $1.50. Parlor Bedroom and bath X for booklet “What's Going On.” P. V. LAND, Manager. Indoor Sports The last dreamy waltz had come to the end. For a moment he held her close in his arms and 1 into the little ear that snuggled on the lapel of his coat. “Tcould dance to Heaven with you,” he said “Oh, it was the wonderful time of my life,” she whispered back Quick change of scenery. Fraternity house. He to . it’s all fall for whispe most Wd room-mate: the same line.” Sorority house. She to room-mate: Poor fish. Funny he never gets wise.” Boy, open the revolving doors, the hearse is out- side. Gargoyle. We Ask You If you don’t feel just right, If you can’t sleep at night, If you moan and sigh, If your throat is dry, If you can’t smoke or oa drink, If your grub tastes like ink, If your heart doesn’t beat, If you've got cold feet, If yourhead’sina whirl— WHY DON’T YOU MARRY THE GIRL?— Tiger. This Bolshevik maiden But, comrades, you'd best not be shovin’ For dynamite hair pins adorn la petite, Front Row Conservation Mr. Bach—See that chorus girl there on the end? They pay her fifty dollars a week for not saying a word Oldboy—Huh, I know a gent at the club who's | paying her sixty dollars a week for the same thing.— Pelican. And her hat-box hol ernor!—Record. My Rows Awry The hours I spent in sweater art Are as a string of purls—I sigh To count them over, every one apart. My rows, awry! My rows awry! cach hour I purl, each purl take care To drop no stitch lest I be stung; T count, yea count, unto the end and there— | A sleeve is hun g! | O memories that bless and burn Oraveling out at bitter loss. I drop a purl, yet strive at last to learn To knit across, sweet art! To knit across!—Smith College Monthly. sleeve is hui With the Gllege Wits Irrepressible. Joyous, Bang! Se \ Ce trespousible Conserved “Here's to your health, Reuben.” “Where'd you git the liquor?” “ Squeezed it outen a mince pie a temp'rance woman gimme.” —Widow. Cherchez la Femme! Yvette had A brand new gown. He loathed to go In debt He hoped That he'd forget How many francs It cost. And yet— There was so little Gown— So much cette, Pelican. \\ The Lubricant Oily to bed And oily to rise Is the fate of a man When an auto he buys. ~Punch Bor Too Much She—Will you buy me that handkerchief? It costs only three dollars It—No; t too much to blow in.—Hil Sieve. —_—_e Let there be Wassailing It is foolish, we know, to deny What every good journal affirms; The Huns may be starving, is pretty and sweet, but why Don’t they live on their Diet of Worms? ds bombs for the Gov —Lampoon. The Dear Things Her—Theodore seems to be a very promis- ing fellow. She—No doubt about that. to him once myself.—Jester I was engaged JUDGE ae are %\ Dime WRITE THE \VoRnoS We wnte music and assist in se ceptance. Submit poems on CHESTER MUSIC COMPANY 633 South Dearborn St., Suite 253, CHICAGO, ILLINOIS. comicbooks.com