Judge, 1918-07-20 · page 23 of 32
Judge — July 20, 1918 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical pieces targeting early 20th-century social customs and wartime attitudes. **"A Successful Financial Deal"** mocks the practice of borrowing garden tools among neighbors—you buy expensive equipment ($41.91) only to lend it out constantly while borrowing others' tools for your own use. The joke: tools rarely get returned, forcing you to maintain duplicates. **"Tipping" section** satirizes the confusion around tipping customs, defining a tip as "parting a fool from his money"—poking fun at both the practice itself and those who participate. **"Wet and Dry"** contains drinking-related humor, with one piece mocking a drunk man's behavior during wartime ("Over There" references WWI). **"The Mentality of Mannheim"** is overtly anti-German propaganda. Two German characters (Herr Dusendorf and "The Same") discuss bombing, with one horrified at civilian casualties while the other callously justifies it. The satire suggests German indifference to the Geneva Convention and civilian suffering—typical wartime propaganda portraying Germans as barbaric.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Successful Financial Deal jucat. ds the bold. (Val. | BORROWERS ] Rules for the Gardener—In tools for gardening, you require a wheel-hoe with cultivator, rake, plow, side-hoe, seed- dropper, and all the wrinkles, about $14.35; miscellancous hand-hoes, rake: cultivators, pushers, pullers, persuaders, and grabber, $27.56. Total about $41.91. re not to use on your own garden, but to lend to your neighbors. You do your own work with tools bor- rowed from one neighbor while another neighbor is using the ones you bought. Garden tools are like a circulating library only very few of the things come back. You must also have a large supply of monkey-wrenches, Stilson wrenches, ham- mers, saws, screw-drivers, etc., because the neighbors who borrow your garden tools will naturally hesitate to ask you to come over and fix ’em when they get out of whack, but will be glad to borrow the tools to fix ‘em with. So you just gotta have plenty of implements and tools.—Richmond Times-Dispatch. These tools Laying Down the Law—‘I don’t mind lending you my hoe, my ax, my lawn mower, the madam’s ice cream ezer and a lot of other things about the said Mr. Glipping, “but I'll a fair warning, Gadsour.”” th? What's the trouble?” “If you ever come over here and try to borrow our portable garage, I’m going to say ‘No.’"—Birmingham Age-Herald. | TIPPING I a Cabby's Sugg A lady presented the cabman with his exact legal fare and a stale bun, remarking that the latter was for himself “Oh, thank ye, mum,” said the cabby, sarcastically. “But ain't yer got a bit hay for the poor old ‘oss?”—Answers. Explained—" What's a tip, pop?” “You've heard, haven't you, my of parting a fool from his money?” “Well, a tip is what they do it with.” Baltimore American. What He ve—First broker—What do you usually give your waiter? Second ditto—Oh, if he serves me well I give him a tip of a quarter; if bad give him a tip on stocks.—Boston script. | WET AND DRY Bound To Be Noticed—" Did you sce me last night at any time between the hours of 9:30 and 2 o'clock?” asked Bib bleton. “T saw you about midnight.” “Was I—er—attracting undue atten tion to myself? “T wouldn't call it undue attention considering the circumstances. You were marching down the street with your arms around two newsboys and lustily Birmingham singing, ‘Over There.’”” Age-Herald. Not His Fault—Father McNally— Shame on ye, O'Leary, ye're half drank O'Leary (apologetically)—Oi know it yer reverence, but it’s not my fault Oi've sphint all the money Oi had St. Louis Times. The Mentality of Mannheim Herr Dusxorr (enjoying the doings of the Gothas)—Ho! ho! ho-o! Zese schwein-dogs of Englisch, und zeir vifes und chiltren plown all to bieces! acteristic Cherman hun ef Tur Same (when the Allies’ / prutes—to go drobbing pombs on goot of ze “Cheneva Gonvention . ja, id iss unteniably a char- rmen are busy overhead)—Gott in Himmel! Zese efil-minded nocent beoples! Id iss apsolute mur-der! Vat iss ze such adrocities are bermitted?—Bystander (London). comicbooks.com