Judge — July 13, 1918 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

By Private Cu Illustrated by ALBERT LEVERING ve EGGINS are just two of the innumerable, pe- culiar and unjustifiable devices employed in army circles to make a soldier late for reveille, industrious before inspection and uncomely at retreat. They encase the calves of the legs and for conscientious clinging they have theivy put into the class with the shifting sands. They keep the lower half secure from the prying eyes of the curious and block the passage of the cold blasts in winter. They have no set theovies of existence, except that they are issued by the quartermaster’s department and are the only binding claims some men have to being soldier: Judgment should not be too harsh, however, as leggins must do some good. Just what this good is will make an interest- ing topic for high-school debates after the war. At the present t is a’ mystery. It might not be amiss right now, for the sake of the mi fled and nonplussed, off prize for the best gue This would not only be conducive to a spirited contest for those who will never know what it is to wear leggins, but if a logical hypothesis is advanced it will be of untold benefit to the restless soldier who will never be satisfied until he is put righton the matter. For the most part leggins are made of canvas. A long string, minus the very essential tin tip, angling in and out from hook to eyelet, courses an erratic way from the buckled base to the top like a wastrel returning home after a night with the boys, all Bevoed up. It is this string that causes the major part of the anguish. In the early morning when the dawn is smearing the East and the air is saturated with the efforts of sixteen buglers and four drummers to become proficient enough in their deadly art to constitute the regimental band, the private soldier begins the task of putting on his leggins. He gets an edge on the fifteen ions who are baf- to Leccins KEEP THE LOWER HALF SECURE FROM THE PRYING EYES OF THE CURIOUS Rookie Realisms sTER W. Suarer, Ambulance 339, 310th Sanitary Train LEGGINS minutes allotted by the Government by sleeping in his underwear and socks. Despite this advantage, how- ever, he frequently loses and comes up on the line with the knowledge that he will get a week on extra duty for his tardiness. Many an even-tempered youth, designed primarily for the ministry, who yielded to the siren call of the local draft board, develops a vocabulary, while putting w on his leggins, that he would have missed completely had the world been stocked with more antiseptic , when the war broke out. Even the army reg- ular, rough and indomitable, mourns this task. It is nothing if not colossal, and when the string has’snapped or has some conscientious scruple about being forced through an eyelet, all the good intentions are kippered and decency, respect and gentlemanly bearing go haywi Leggi cause just another of the many wishes that will come true when the dove of peace gets old enough to stew. Privates, first-class privates and non-commissioned officers wear leg- \k gins. Commissioned officers wear Qs leather puttees. The difference be- tween the two has been responsible for the third and fourth officers’ training ‘ schools: A private secking promotion puts a | | leather puttece up on one side of nis vision and \ a canvas leggin on the other. When he con- a trasts the two he gets out his extra copy of } Moss’ Manual on Military Training and spends a i] night in study that he would otherwise have given et to social deployment. Leggins are always cleaned before inspection. This increases the soldier’s love for them. But, with all this affection, they will have to go, some H day. After Jess Willard and the Kaiser get to- gether for a double over a vaudeville circuit, and the treaties have been signed in pencil so it will be unnecessary to destroy them in case | of an emergency, the returned soldier will kick off his breeches instead of tugging them off and there will be no canvas bark ; to peel before the light is switched and the pillows do some royal entertaining. comicbooks.com