Judge, 1918-07-06 · page 33 of 36
Judge — July 6, 1918 — page 33: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This article is **satire on hotel theft**. The author, Harry Irving Shuway, humorously catalogs items guests routinely steal from hotels—towels, stationery with the hotel logo, china match safes, enameled trays, lace curtains, water pitchers, soap dishes, and towels again—presenting petty larceny as an accepted "indoor sport" and "Christian" tradition. The cartoon illustration (by Sanford Tousey) shows a woman supervising children who appear to be gathering items, visualizing the text's theme. The satire's point: hotel theft was so commonplace in 1918 that Judge could mock it as normal behavior. The detailed, almost instructional tone—explaining how to pack stolen goods efficiently—amplifies the absurdity. The final joke (stealing "everything now but the Gideon Bible") suggests even morality has limits. This reflects pre-modern attitudes toward minor theft from commercial establishments as amusing rather than criminal.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ed or) ne n= ore ou as er no ont my sir, ms ein his n't reel Money », N.Y. July 6, 1918 y, puta sharp point on n Gathering the Harvest By Harry Irvine Snusway HERE are almost as many nice things to steal from a hotel room as there ever were. To be sure, the cakes of soap are smaller than they were before the war, but the towels are just as slippery as ever. This is one of the indoor sports that has not been seriously interfered with by the great conflict, and as a great Christian nation we ought to be thankful that we can still clean out a hotel room as of yore. How few people are really thorough in doing a thing of this kind though. They go away the next morning with a feeling that nothing has been overlooked. Stand- ing in the middle of the floor, they pan- oram the room with an appraising ey “Well, I guess we haven’t forgotten any thing,” they say, and then go out and leave a perfectly good rug on the floor. One should be efficient in these things. What a lot of things there are to gather in a hotel room, when one stops to think of it! The writing paper, for instance. You hate to write letters usually. But on pulling out the single drawer in the table, you behold a nice pile of stationery, with a picture of the hotel in the corner and the number of baths there are init. This is the thing that hotels brag about, their baths. So you drag this out and write the following nineteen times; “Am stopping here. Having a wonderful time. Love to all.” If there is any paper left over, it goes into the bottom of the bag so it will lie flat. Then there are the match safes, china ones. These don’t take up much room and you might as well take them along. They come in so handy at Christmas time. The enameled trays give a lot of bother un- less you have a large suit- case. They are too long to go in an ordinary bag. But one cannot leave them. They have such pretty pictures of somebody’s beer on them. Anybody with any love of art at all can make sacrifices— and lug along a big suit-case. A tray can be inserted between a shirt in the shirt department of a suit-case. ‘The water pitcher can be arranged for traveling very nicely, along with the glass. Wrap the glass in one of the lace curtains which can be readily removed from the window and then stuff it inside the pitcher. It will ride well, you will find. The other lace curtain can be wrapped around the soap dish, which can be coaxed tocome along with the aid of a screw-driver. ‘The soap and towels come last. Too bad, the towels have the name of the hotel embroidered on the corner. It will take half an hour to pick it out with a sharp knife when you get home. Hotels are so thoughtless; th never care how much work they make for anybody. Well, I guess we've got everything now but the Gideon Bible. ‘THIS amusing picture in full colors, 9x12, mounted on a heavy mat, ready for the frame, will be sent postpaid for twenty-five cents Judge Art Print Department 225 Fifth Avenue New York City On, YOU V ‘ peoples So te Trat's LIVING. werinthe LIONEL STRONGFORT Physical and Health Specialist 889 PARK BLO, ee SRE INK Noa. HOTEL SAN REMO Central Park West, 74th and 75th Streets NEW YORK Overlooking Central Park's most pict tive during the Spn 1S to fathers. mothers and children ath 7 day and upwards. and upwards. 50 bath—£4.00 per da piSPECIAL WEEKLY RATES Pe Vite for I The Open Door “Have you an opening for me?” “You just came through it.” A Privilege of Distinction “Tcannot understand how such a distinguished author can be such an awful bore.” “Why, it would be too expensive for her to say ything She has to save all that for her books A Changed Verdict Busler—Hadn't we better begin to be a little neighborly with the Greens? Mrs. Busler—The Greens? Those horrid things? Never! Busler—But they won't possibly be able to use everything they're raising in their war garden. Mrs. Busler—Oh! Very Necessary Mrs. Benham—Ba today. Benham—Tell him we need that kind of food to win the war. y swallowed a qua er | : comicbooks.com