Judge, 1918-06-29 · page 27 of 37
Judge — June 29, 1918 — page 27: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from the satirical magazine *Judge* uses humor to critique American politics and social behavior during World War I. **"Simplified Civics"** mocks political party organizations as self-serving machines that lose elections either way—by failing to win or by winning and disappointing supporters with empty promises. The satire suggests politicians care more about holding office than serving constituents. **"The Notion Counter"** contains brief, cynical observations about relationships and human nature. The opening joke about military mortality rates and the national anthem's second verse is topical—troops apparently died singing patriotic songs, suggesting blind patriotism as wasteful. The scattered aphorisms mock marriage ("a wife sometimes seems to think that he agreed to cherish her whole family"), hypocrisy, and self-deception—common *Judge* fare satirizing American domestic and political life. **Context**: Published during WWI's final year, the page reflects wartime cynicism while advertising cigarettes and art prints, typical of the era's magazine economy.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
IGE Pune 29. 1918 Simplified Civics By Aveert E. Hoyt Pie: organizations are maintained for three purposes—to nominate and elect party candidates have it handed to them. Party organizations are of two kinds — | those that lose by losing the election and those that lose by winning the election. Party candidates are also of two kinds —those that promise the organization nothing and keep the promise and those that promise the organization everything and keep the jobs. Sometimes the election is so close that for weeks afterward the organization does not know whether it is going to be trimmed by the opposing candidate or by haq | its own. In the good old days when there were ven't | 90 party organizations to ignore, public and day to be ‘Toop n the pply officials were driven to all sorts of expedi- ents, and some of them had to quarrel with their wives to show their indepen- dence. Public officials must have set conv Rople of culture and Inement invarial PREFER_ Deities ther cigarette. 25° A love affair to a man is like a circus parade to the main street of a town: it fills him full of music at the time but leaves him all cut up afterward. Many a man who would willingly as- sume the responsibility of running the war can’t go down town with an um- brella and come home with it. There is a law against polygamy, but nevertheless a wife sometimes seems to think that he agreed to cherish her whole family. We recently motored around Beaver Falls, Pa., and were surprised to find that it was named after an animal, not a hat. It may be true that sweet are the uses of adversity, but we are mighty willing to cut out the sweets. I don’t know which I would rather not be—a horse in a livery stable or a vic- trola in a club. The preacher begins his prayer “Oh, Lord!” and sometimes we say the same before he gets through. It is hard to get her to say she loves you, but it is harder to believe it after she does. Field tions, only they mustn’t use yesterday's d to | set. rinor A man may stay in Congress just as tion, | long as he serves us and opposes our best -call | interests, but he mustn’t oppose us and vital. | serve our best interests. He must have the | an open mind, and keep it wagging. mall He mustn't get it in his head that we fthe | want what we need when we want what o be | we want. ning | Reform measures are passed to prevent increasing prices and decreasing majori- cept | ties. Reform measures do a world of good and ,by meeting the public demand that “something ought to be done about it,” and they don’t do a bit of harm unle: enforced. as The Notion Counter tch, By Dovetas Matrocu THERE never was such a mortali | among troops as there is in a bai quet crowd singing “The Star Spangled Banner” when the orchestra starts the second verse. é RD. Come to think of it, most of our rtiss | blueness was caused by a pair of blue ird- | eves. try It is the thing we say without thinking ard. | that gives the most pain—or joy. the Send twenty-five cen llxl4 A TRENCH seaDE. 22S FIFTH AVENUE “A TRENCH SPADE” Trump It with a Quarter and Take It you, postage paid, a copy of this Just another one of Norman Rockwell’s popular JUDGE covers reproduced in full colors and mounted on a heavy mat, all ready for the frame. for the camp, den or home. JUDGE ART PRINT DEPARTMENT LEAD! stamps, and we will mail to clever and timely picture. sh or An attractive decoration 3 NEW YORK CITY We might be happy if we could do either one of two things: believe her or leave her. There is one war that will never end; the war between your heart and your mind. Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to knit a sweater. Whenever the Germans are least san- guine they seem to get most sangui- nary. A quartet consists of three fellows and another one who always shows up late. Many a woman who caught a husband wishes it had been the mumps instead. We not only love our returned soldiers, we even admire their French. Keep your mind on your work but don’t let it work on your mind. But the garden plots will do much to offset the German plots. A watched pot never boils and a watched mailman never comes. No vice is as bad as a virtue gone mad. At a crowded hotel there’s plenty of room at the top rate. The waiters are numbered; how often we wish it were their days! A man who is slow to anger is slow to cool off. He is a poor marksman who can’t hit the German front. Young persons growing war gardens now know why Mary was quite contrary. Some people cough as though they were proud of it. When ignorance is bliss ’tis wise to be foolish. Some things come hard, but so does a diamond. Many flush. Girls had better believe than be left. are called, but few have a comicbooks.com