Judge — June 1, 1918 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HOTEL SEVILLE Fifth Ave. and 29th St., New York City Convenient to all best shops. Ideal for out-of-town visitors. Single Rooms with Detached Bath, $2.00 per day. Single R Rooms with Priva: $2.50 per day upward. Rooms, with Bath, for Two, $3 to $5 per da; Parlor, Bedroom and Bath, $5 to $10 per day. Send for diagram showing fixed rooms prices JOHN F. GARRETY, Mgr. Bath, WANTED—AN IDEA! simple thing ta patent? Protect, your ideas. they mal pou wealth. | Write for “Needed Inventions" “How to Get Your Patent and Your Money.” Patent Attorneys, Dept. 129. Washington, Caloric Poetry By Treve Cottins, Jr. ‘O longer do you purchase food according to your salary; Instead you base your meals upon the Con- servation Calory. An ordinary mortal needs food units by the score; Some need two thousand daily, while still others want much more. So wher. you seek a hash-house and peruse the bill of fare, You note the list of calories beside the food that's there. And though you yearn for nice, thick steak, potatoes, peas and such, You find their strength in calories is far, oh, far too much. And so with doleful eye you sit, till finally with a sigh, You order up a dish of beans and one small piece of pie! Some Sense In It “We are too likely to accept for wisdom a great many old sayings that, in reality, are mere stuff and nonsense. There's that ancient one, ‘Old friends are the best friends,’ for instanc Is there any sense in accepting that as a rule? “T think there is. Our old friends are like! to die off pretty soon and cease to come to us for favors.” Roped In Knicker—Jones was drafted after he was refused as a volunteer. Bocker—That’s how you feel when the second girl you ask takes you. WHO CAN THINK OF SOME bring Randolph & Co, | | | | Thrown Back With a Loss By Frev Lapp ULU and Lola had been very dear friends before the outbreak of the Great War. If Lulu and Lola had cherished each other before, now they were become as two thoughts with but a single soul. Do not scrutinize or criticize this idea of Lulu and Lola being Thoughts. Many a man had nearly perished because of their Power. When Lola and Lulu stopped gabbing at the manicure desks where they were employed in the Hotel Bel Cinch there was a silence among the patrons that showed up well in comparison with the Line of Talk that had prevailed in Peace times. Lulu and Lola simply finished each manicure job too swiftly to indulge at all in Repartee, and knitted, knit, knit, knitted. Then, when night came, they got together and discussed the Tech- nique Ve come now to the Fatal night. A perfect Dream of an Officer, in a wonderful uniform, had presented his Nails to Lulu and Lola on the same day, morning and afternoon. Lulu, who was a blonde, and Lola, who had tried to be, were each much taken with his fighting eyes, and his svelte chest; they adored him. They discussed, that night, not the technique of knitting but the sweet, old, intricate technique of Flirtation. It is now midnight, of the Fatal Night. Lulu has let down her hair, which reaches nearly to the second dimple on her left knee—“ Lola, He had the sweetest, most adorable wrists—did you notice his wi rists?” - “T noticed his wrist watch,” said Lola; “but I do truly believe the most wonder- ful thing about him was his waist-line. It was absolutely ravishing!” Lola threw a perfectly good silk stocking across the corner of the mirror. . . . And looked up, into Lulu’s eyes, with a haunted look in her own... . “Do you know,” she dreamily said, “I’ve been wondering what kind of a wife He has—that is, i Lulu laughed: were married.” Lola blushed prettily, and didn’t finish pulling off her second silk stocking. . . . She made a picture, in her Maiden Ex- “He asked me if you 1,000 ISLAND HOUSE Alexandria Bay, Jefferson County, New York Inthe most e are rarest, all the delights of modern 1,000 Island House. living facilities or such luxurious comfort— as does this palatial Summer retreat. every hour, or quiet, complete rest, In the Heart of the Thousand Islands ‘ica, where nature’s charms vilization are added in the No hotel of the Metropolis provides greater i al HOME comfort musement for f every guest. chanting spot in all Am the choi All Drinking Water Used in the House is Filtered. O. G. STAPLES, Prop. Send two 2-cent stamps for Illustrated Booklet. JAMES RUNCIMAN, Mgr. “No Man’s Land” By David Robinson Te clever picture, a reproduction of one of the many popular covers of JUDGE, in full colors, mounted on a heavy mat, 11x14, ready for framing, makes an attractive decora- tion for any man’s “Land.” It will be mailed post free upon receipt of twenty-five cents, cash or stamps. Write Judge Art Print Department 225 Fifth Avenue New York City pectancy and pretty Innocence, as she yly asked, “And what did you tell Hi . Dear?” “T said,” remarked Lulu in a strangely honeyed tone, “I said that you had tried to be ever since I knew you.” Lola’s cheeks blazed. “Do you know,” she sweetly said, “He asked me the same question about you.” ‘ Lulu tensely asked—“ You said-——” “T told him, dear, that you had five children at home, and one at the Front.” Moral: Beware of the Counter Attack. Poetic Justice By McLaxpsurcu Witsonx F any man is found With treason on his tongue, What justice shall we mete? How shall his doom be rung? To make him kiss the flag Atonement will not suit; From such polluted lips Quite useless is salute. On war stamps make him spend All riches he has gained, And have him lick them fast Until his tongue is sprained. Strong For It “Any community singing in your neighbor hood?” “The cats go in for it.” comicbooks.com