Judge, 1918-05-04 · page 8 of 38
Judge — May 4, 1918 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This satirical piece exposes upper-class hypocrisy during wartime (likely WWI, given references to the Red Cross drive and draft). The author presents a series of overheard boasts from wealthy women, each claiming patriotic sacrifice while revealing their actual self-interest: - A woman claims her husband is patriotic, but she's removing her daughter from school due to "bothering eyes" - Another brags about donating to Red Cross while admitting financial strain - A third speaks of losing their servant to the draft while complaining about replacing him - One claims to refuse confectioner services (implying self-sufficiency/sacrifice) while spending hours in surgery - The final jab: someone advocates for Prohibition while ordering a cocktail, claiming exhaustion The satire targets the gap between public patriotic posturing and private entitlement—women performing wartime commitment while prioritizing comfort and convenience. Their "false faces" are the respectable personas they present to society.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Drawn by Avex Sass Wirey (to newly commissioned subaltern)—Quick! Fred, there are two privates coming down the street. I wish you'd go and stand at the gate so I can watch you being saluted. When Spring Arrives “T always leave off my flannels on the first of May “Quite so, Algy. And when do you feel safe in leaving off your spats?” Animal Study Little Georgia and Marion had spent the day in the park in company with a party of rela- tiv They had been shown the animals, including the alli- gators. On the return trip home little Georgia was very quiet. At last she said: “Grandma, what was that animal with the big mouth?” Little Marion (not waiting for grandmother to reply) spoke up: “Why, Georgia, don’t you know that was an elevator.” Explained Willis—Has your son start- ed in at college yet? Gillis—Yes. I went down the first week he was there and paid $800 worth of bills. Willis—Great Scott, isn’t he extravagant? Gillis—O, those were bills that I ran when I was in col- lege. The tradesmen wouldn't trust him until they were paid. Drawn by R. B. Furie False Faces By Kate B. Burros Y HUSBAND is so patriotic, he would do anything for the government. Elise has never had the least trouble in keeping up with her classes, but her eyes are bothering her now, and I am afraid we will have to take her out of school. Yes, our orchids are rather nice this winter. I gave more than I could really afford to the Red Cross drive, and it leaves me rather— Our second man has been drafted, and we have about given up trying to fill his place. Gerald was determined not to ask exemption. the Law Department at Washington. My cook does all our fancy desserts herself; I never have to order a thing from the confectioner. Dr. Cuttem considers it the most serious operation of the sort he has ever undertaken. I was on the operating table over two hours— You know I am pledged to Surgical Dressings for three days a week, and allow no social engagements to interfere with my work. Mr. Highnote is urging me to let my daughter try her voice in concert. Certainly, I am in favor of Prohibition for this coun- try. Do order a cocktail, we are all so tired. He is in War Gardens If war gardeners do not utilize every available foot of ground this year they should at least use every yard—particularly the back yards. That's the Question Adoring mama—Isn’t Clarissa’s violin playing wonderful? And she has taken but six lessons. Grimguy—On what has she taken them, ma’am? A New Boe A certain private in a ball game behind the American lines has just made a home run