Judge — February 2, 1918 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Breaking a Lease—The decision of the Appellate Division of the Supreme Court that a loft tenant may break his lease if the clevator service fails recalls by contrast the old story of the con- ductor who refused to carry further the passenger that tried to board the train after having fallen out of the window. “Your ticket,” ruled the train tyrant, “is not good if you break vour journey.” —New York Evening Sun. For Her Own Protection—“ Yes, madam,” said a Chicago salesman, “this is the most exquisite dinner-set we ever handled. The price is $200.”” “Tl take it,” said the lady on the other side of the counter, “if you'll agree to mark it ‘Imitation—Price $8.25.’" “Of course, madam, but—er—that’s rather an odd request.” “T realize that, but I want to deceive our servant-girl.”—Harper’s Magazine. Fraudulent Advertising —Sacca Bonna wants something severe done to people who don’t do as they advertise to do. He says he saw a sign in a street car: When They Strike Camp “Et le fromage, chef, qu'est-ce quil faudra en faire?" “Laisserle... Il suiora la colonne!” “And the cheese, chef; what shall I do with that?” “Just let italone. It'll follow the column.” — Le Péle-Méle (Paris). “Buy O’Flannagan’s rubber hecls; 50 cents attached.” And so he went and bought a pair, but there was no half-dollar attached, and he believes he has been swindled. The Yellow Strand. The Grown Prince's Amiable Wit H mutilato— Altezza, ho perduto una gamba HM Kronprinz—Io non trovato nulla! Crip pled soldier —Your highness, [lost a leg Willy the Inimitable—Well, I'm sure 1 haven't found any.—I1 520 (Florence). ACTORS | [ setadienalrsieepeeneneen naman! And Buried—Julius Tannen, the lead- ing comedian in the Spanish musical comedy, “The Land of Joy,” insists that the date of Shakespeare’s death should be publicly celebrated in New York and celebrated every year, since in no city in America is Shakespeare so completely dead as he is there.—Golden News. Stranded—First Thespian—I wonder if the ghost will walk this week? Second ditto—There is one thing cer- tain: if the ghost doesn’t walk, we will. —San Francisco Chronide. Finish of the Trip—‘That actor is very pompous. He says he has ‘arrived.’”” “He has,” replied the manager. “This is where he gets off.”’—San Francisco News-Letter. ~ | DOCTORS | A Christening—"Aren’t those all doctors who just went in that house?” asked a passerby. “That’s what they are, sir,” replied the fur-encased chauffeur standing by the car of one of the physicians. “What's going on?” A christening, sir.” “Why all the doctors at a christening?” “You see, sir, they have just discovered a new disease and they’re going to name it this afternoon.”—Yonkers Statesman. Cured—Doctor—Did that cure for deafness really help your brother? Pat—Sure enough; he hadn’t heard a id the day after he took he heard from a friend in New York American. that Expiration—An official of the board of health, in a town not far from Boston, notified a citizen that his license to keep # cow on his premises had expired. In reply to this letter, the official received the following communication: “Monsieur Bord of Helt—I jus’ get your notis that my licens to keep my The Two-Cent Newspaper “Oui, m@me Chose, Cest une honte. . un sou de plus, le journal et pas un crime de plus de plus..'. meme dans le roman!” I call it an outrage. Pay two cents dof one, and you don’t get a single crime more, not even in the continued story. ——Le Rire (Paris).