Judge, 1917-04-28 · page 5 of 28
Judge — April 28, 1917 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* magazine contains three separate pieces of satirical writing rather than political cartoons: **"From a Sinner's Diary"** mocks marital compromise, suggesting couples accept mediocrity rather than pursue happiness—a jab at conventional marriage advice. **"The Easiest Way"** satirizes a couple who agreed early in marriage that the wife could "go her way" and the husband his. The piece cynically suggests such arrangements inevitably fail. **"Flirting"** by McLandburgh Wilson presents a humorous poem about a woman named Polly who shops aggressively, boasts about her husband's wealth, but refuses to actually buy anything—satirizing pretentious consumer behavior and materialistic display among women. The decorative header image of the moon ringed by dark formations appears purely decorative and unrelated to the text below.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE RING AROUND THE MOON FROM A SINNER'S DIARY HE ones you give your best to hand you back their worst, mostly—pay you with punched money. If you can’t do as you want to you'll have to do as you can, same as the rest do. Someway I never could neighbor with a thimble. The minute I take my thumb off and don’t hold it on, it shrinks up and. falls off. It’s always easier to poke the needle through on the chair crawl back under the around in the dirt arm than to bureau and claw after a thimble. . much blesseder to give than to receive, as per “swats.” Nobody ever ate chicken but somebody got it read: You get more sympathy from some over a blistered heel than over an aching soul. You can’t be killed when you're dead. I know a woman who you don’t know anything about what she'll say tomorrow by what she says today, nor by either time what she means. When one says “It’s a good world,” you know he’s got a good liver or a better lyre. —Lynette Freemire. The Easiest Way Bach—Don’t you think a husband and wife can come to some sort of an understanding early in that will insure their future happiness? Hubb—Ves; you see, my wife and I. for example, agreed right at the beginning that she was to be allowed to go her way, and I hers. Smithers says he can’t just make out whether that Montana woman was elected to Congress or the Chautauqua. FLIRTING By MeLANDBURGH WILSON OLLY hied her forth to shop Where Cupid hung his sign, Looking for a bargain nice In the husband line; Something simple, rich and rare, Cheap and superfine. Then the chubby little clerk Began to maul and pull, Boasted of his splendid line, Showed that it was full, Some he had as fine as silk, Some warranted all wool. Hauled them from the topmost shelf, In his patient way, Showed her every blessed thing But to hear her say Much obliged, but after all She wouldn’t buy to-day. A woman's idea of a movable feast i Sunday dinner. comicbooks.com