Judge, 1917-03-31 · page 5 of 28
Judge — March 31, 1917 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**Top Cartoon - "A Jolt to the Memory":** This depicts a street scene where an elderly woman has fallen or collapsed. A well-dressed man bends toward her while bystanders gather. The caption indicates she's reminding "George" about unpaid debts to an upholsterer. The satire targets social embarrassment—the gentleman's public humiliation when confronted about forgotten financial obligations by someone of lower social standing. **Bottom Story - "Fable of the Iron Suit":** A humorous first-person narrative mocks the endless cycle of purchasing new clothing. The author describes repeatedly buying suits hoping they'll stay new-looking, but they always deteriorate. The moral lesson—never spend more than sixteen dollars—satirizes both consumer vanity and middle-class financial anxiety. The accompanying illustrations show the suit's deterioration and a comical advertisement for "beauty treatment" bath salts.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A JOLT TO THE MEMORY Old lady (sitting down hard and suddenly) —There! that just reminds me, George! We forgot to call at the upholsterer’s about the chair cushions. FABLE OF THE IRON SUIT angels crowded around me and said, “What a nice new suit By EARL SIMONSON you have on!” DON’T REMEMBER when I had that suit made, but it Awaking, I sprang out of bed, tore a hunting knife from the must have been years and years ago. 1 tried every — wall, and with a bloodcurdling yell I slit the offending suit into known way to wear it out, but the thing always continued to tatters, look the same. . ‘The moral is: Never go over sixteen dollars and you'll live Whenever I resurrected it, folks always — longer and happier. would say: “Oh, what a nice new suit you have!” I would try to explain it. was not a new _ suit, but they would smile indulgently. This made me furious. At last, in desperation, I threw it to thy Rags, 1 think, worries his food , but he is quite a sure dog. Rub- bers, gloves, porticres, and even carpets disappear with amaz- ing rapidity down the gullet of this ferocious animal. Still, Iwas disappointed in the job he did. The suit was hardly ruined. To make sure I took it to a tailor’s to have it pressed. To my disgust it looked even better than when I bought it. — The other night I had a horrible dream. It was Judgment AN OPEN SECRET Day, and I was still wearing that Nemesis of a suit. All the “The secret of my beauty treatment is these dust baths!” comicbooks.com