Judge — March 3, 1917 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

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COPY THIS SKETCH Tidal Jet_me see what you ean do with it. STANDS HOT AND COLD WATER Passing the Mustard The Age of Genius What is the age when Genius spreads its pinions And soars to heights beyond our mortal ken? When rules the Muse her ultimate dominions? (Muse of a tiny realm, make At fourteen, Chatterton had gained attention; At fifteen, Pope had published more or less; At sixteen, Byron got a deal of mention, At seventeen, John Dryden went to press. At cighteen, says tradition, David drops his Pebbles and sling, and smites the sacred lyre; At nineteen, Bryant writes his Thanatopsis, At twenty, Shelley sets the world on fire. At twenty-one, come Horace, Heine, Schiller, Keats and Dumas, Disraeli and Voltaire; With lyric, drama, and romantic thriller, And prose and poetry beyond compare. What boots it? Bunyan made his hit at fifty, And Dante did his stunt at fifty-one; Homer was sixty when he got his nifty And well-known epic called “The Iliad” done. At seventy, De Morgan writes his fiction, At eighty, Sarah Bernhardt still will play. Thanks, Gentle Muse, for making no restric- tion We're going to start our masterpiece today! —Ted Robinson, in Cleveland Plain Dealer. A Misnomer—*‘ How much money has my husband in this bank?” I cannot tell you that, madam.” ‘The idea! Aren't you the teller?” — Boston Transcript. Different—"O, come! trouble.” “Borrowing! Gee whizz, man, trouble isn’t like money. When I borrow moncy I can forget about it right away."—Boston Transcript. Stop borrowing Flashlights After the Lord had made the brilliant man, the genius, and the star performer He knew the world would never get anywhere with them alone in it, so He made the hard worker and made him in quantities. You very seldom hear of a young and beautiful girl falling in love with and marry- ing an So-year-old man who hasn't a dollar to his name. One of the things we can’t understand is why strong, healthy children let their par- ents go to the poorhouse. It’s a great event when the first baby gets his first tooth, but the fifth or sixth babe can get a whole mouthful of them without causing any undue excitement. He who has friends has riches.—Eddie Guert in Detroit Free Press. The Other Bell—Hote! Visitor (coming from bathroom)—Here, I've been ringing for you for ages. Chambermaid—Which bell, sir? Visitor—The bell over the: bath. Chambermaid—Oh, we pay no attention to that bell, sir. That’s only put there in case any one feels faint.—Punch. Showing the Town—‘Have a_ big time on your trip to New York ’ “Oh, yes; I invited a native New Yorker to go out and see his town, and he seemed delighted with it.” —Florida Times-Union. Never Again—A recruiting sergeant sta- tioned in the south of Ireland met Pat and asked him to join the army. 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