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Judge, 1917-03-03 · page 21 of 28

Judge — March 3, 1917 — page 21: what you’re looking at

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Judge — March 3, 1917 — page 21: Judge, 1917-03-03

What you’re looking at

This page satirizes the overwrought, melodramatic dialogue style of early 1917 popular novels. The excerpt mocks romantic fiction by showing a couple engaged in absurdly repetitive banter—constantly "flinging" and "hurling" words at each other in an exaggerated confrontation. The humor lies in the ridiculous formality and physical language ("palpably annoyed eyebrow," peculiar ear movement) applied to trivial romantic sparring. The accompanying "Egg View Notes" contain rustic anecdotes about rural characters—including Corny Paine's accidental bull-riding mishap—appearing to parody the stock rural-comedy stories that also populated period magazines. The page also features a Bell System telephone advertisement promoting American communication superiority over fragmented Europe, and a Carbona cleaning fluid ad. These are typical Judge magazine elements: satire paired with period advertising.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

" mamma, dear.”” An Athletic Conversation From a 1917 Novel “T KNOW what I am talking about,” he flung at her. “Do you?” she threw back “T most assuredly do,” he hurled at her. “You sure of it?” she flung back. “Absolutely sure,” he flung at her with a palpably annoyed eyebrow; and then he drove home the truth by flinging at her, Lois DeMontague told me!” “Oh, Lois?” She tossed forth the word lightly, care- lesly, as one confidently sure of winning in the game she was playing with the young Hercules before her. “Yes, Lois; and Harley Livingstone told her.” He drove home with these words as was evident by the sudden pallor that came into the cheeks of the girl before him, but only for an instant did she lose her self- poise and then—— “So!” she hit back scornfully but with awhimsical, half-humorous eyebrow and a peculiar muscular movement of one little pink ear. He bounded to his feet, sprang toward her and flashed forth, you are not playing the game fair!” y not?” she flung back lightly, and at that moment her mother entered the room. He took his departure at once and Lois sank into her chair with an amused and a narrow parting of her sensitive “Trather think that I scored that time, —J. L. Harbour. Egg View Notes TE GIMBER has scratched Muley Can- non’s name off of his Christmas gift list. Muley is too hard up Corny Paine has something worth while to be thankful for at this time, and probably stands out as being the only living person on earth who can claim, without lying, that he has rode on the back of a grouchy-acting bull. Corny got half way across Nehemiah Knobrick’s field with a step-ladder Tuesday afternoon, before Nehemiah’s Jersey caught sight of him, quickly recalled some petty grievance, and took after him at a high rate of speed. Being muddled up, Corny Was too scared to run, so he immediately dumb the ladder, which was struck so hard by the bull a minute later, that Corny fell off and lit straddle the animal's back. With Plenty of head-shaking, tailwaving, and snorting, the Jersey untangled his feet from the ladder and galloped straight < bump so suddenly and unexpected! @ stone wall that Corny went over it, with 2 big rush, onto a pile of hay which Lem Bushnell, our marshal, strongly and pub- licly suspicions was put there by Corny for that Purpose. . s his shoulders back only when he’s betting on his height or just stepping out of be cider mill. —Leslie Van Avery. One Languag i Unrestricted} Nntercommunicatio Throughout the vast area of this country prevails a common tongue. The whole of Europe hardly exceeds our territory, yet Europe has more than a score of nationalities and many dif- ferent languages. _ In the United Sjates the telephone, as exemplified by Bell System,renders a matchless service in its mastery of distance and in encouraging the use of a universal language. This accom- plishment is in spite of the great influx of population from every country in the world. In Europe the independent coun- tries, separated by barriers of language, ‘ ] , Europe's many tongues and - consequent misunderstandings The Fruits of Understanding and lacking efficient telephone service, suffer from inadequate facilities for inter-communication. We now talk from the Atlantic Coast to the Pacific, and eliminate more than three thousand miles. In Europe, contending with a babel of voices and unrelated telephone sys- tems, a bare quarter of that distance has been bridged with difficulty. The ideal of the Bell System has been day by day to extend its service in the interest of all telephone users. Its efforts have resulted in providing the facilities to unite cities and rural districts in true American democracy. =~ AMERICAN TELEPHONE AND TELEGRAPH COMPANY AND ASSOCIATED COMPANIES One System Universal Service I like it, too, because it is perfectly safe to use day or night—you know Carbona is the one cleaning fluid that—will not explode.”’ “1 saved this dress for 15 cents—’’ “You remember that awful grease spot? I took it “"" CARBQNA Cleaning Fluid And, my dear, you can use Carbona on anything be- cause it will not injure the most delicate fabric or color. ©. —$1.00 bottles. ‘At all druggists. lise.