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Judge, 1916-12-02 · page 28 of 36

Judge — December 2, 1916 — page 28: what you’re looking at

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Judge — December 2, 1916 — page 28: Judge, 1916-12-02

What you’re looking at

This page is primarily **advertising and light humor** rather than political satire. The main text content includes: 1. **"A Christmas Carol"** — a humorous poem by W.D. Nesbit listing absurd gift ideas, ending with the joke that despite vowing to spend less, the list is "endless" and someone must "break the news to father" about the expense. 2. **"Grounds For Suspicion"** — a brief comedic dialogue by S.E. Kiser about a wife seeking divorce. The joke relies on period gender dynamics: the wife claims infidelity because her husband didn't scold her for lunching with an engaged gentleman—his *indifference* proves he no longer loves her. The humor comes from her twisted logic and the judge's bemused responses. The remainder consists of era-typical advertisements for cough drops, mail-order music lessons, tire companies, hotels, and patent services. No identifiable political figures or events appear on this page.

📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LUDEN'S Stop Rainy Day Sneez Feet wet— clothing damp? Take Luden’s to prevent after effects. Give Quick Relief. Inthe Yellow MENTHOL COUGH DROPS Coughs and colds quickly respond to Luden's— as do other ailments of the throat and nose. WM. H. LUDEN, Mfg. Confectioner, READING, PA. LEARN MUSIC AT HOME! New Method-Learnto Play By Note— Violin, Ba net, Tarp, Clarinet, Trombone 1 Limi You pay only for music ¢. which is small. Write fe U, S. SCHOOL OF MUSIC, Box 282 225 Fifth Avenue, New York City 2 the money, Bt. Levis, He. COPY THIS SKETCH and let_mesee what you can do with It Illustrators and eartooalsts earn from $2010 S125 aw aed 1 will wad you a tes of drawings show ing possit THE LANDON SCHOO! 1483 Sehofleld Ratiding, € WHO CAN THINK OF SOME } hey may bring “and wt WANTED AN IDEA! rf hington, my good wishes for the French and Ger- man theaters.” “Speaking of the French and German theaters,” said the Tired Business Man, “which of the two do you prefer?” “Which do I prefer?” said the Critic, cautiously. “Oh—as to that—I’m strictly neutral.” A Christmas Carol HAVING sets Encyclopaedias, Cellarets, Bound verses tedious, Laundry bags, Embroidered pieces, Checks for “stags.” Complexion greases, Pree: + for the shoes, acco holders, s for booze, » folders, Match holders, shirts, \ dictionary, Fans meant for flirts, Silk hose, Good Fairy, Button hook. Electric toaster, Pocket book, \ college poster, Scarf-pin, links, A sweater, classy, a or drinks, \ cleek, a brassie, Jumping Jack, \ Shetland pony, Towel rack. Cravat that’s tony, Heater for car, Tales from the German, \ flower jar, A set of ermine Though we vowed This year we'd spend less, For our crowd The list is endless. We must take The fret and bother— Then we'll break The news to father. WD. Nesbit Grounds For Suspicion “ ADAM,” said the judge, “I can’t grant you a divorce merely be cause your husband has ceased to ad dress you in’ terms of endearment n if he no longer calls you darling nd sweetheart he may have sincere flection for you.” “Oh, but Judge,” she urged, “L know he doesn’t care for me any more.” “Has he ever struck you?” “No; but [ have reasons for believing he is false to me.” “Ah! That is different. What is ‘your evidence?” “Well, Judge, he caught me out at lunch with a gentleman friend, yesterday, and when he came home last night he never even mentioned it.” “Perhaps he had no reason to be con- cerned.” “But he had, Judge. and I are engaged. me believe a person as that and be true.” The gentleman You can’t’ make can be as indifferent -S. E. Kiser Buy Your Tires At Factory Prices All you need to know about the tires you is how much they st and how long they will last. UCK, Bist RES Buckskins are sold direct at prices which are “the lowest in America.” They are cheap in price only. Hundreds of Buckskin users get much more than the ing bath, $1.00 oom and bath, $3. European Plan oom. with a. Suites, partor, ers, Foot West 2ut street, take 2M ar. jor Colored Map of New York. HENRY LINDENMEYR & SONS PAPER WAREH ouseE “irae ALL KE (Ds oF PAPER MADI ST ORDER