Judge, 1916-10-14 · page 5 of 28
Judge — October 14, 1916 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**Top Cartoon:** "The Pessimist Starts Out for an Afternoon Spin" depicts an early automobile loaded with stacked mattresses, driven by two men in hats through a rural setting. The joke appears to be about automotive unreliability—the driver has brought bedding presumably because car breakdowns were so common and lengthy that travelers might need to sleep roadside. This reflects the nascent automobile era (likely 1900s-1910s) when cars were notoriously undependable. **Text Sections:** The page contains three separate pieces: "Ways of Women" (about mothers and discipline), "Some People You Have Known" (about Mrs. N.V. Utterz), and "Just to Make Him Glad" (a sentimental poem). A bottom cartoon shows silhouettes of women discussing husbands' excuses. The overall page mixes domestic satire with automotive humor typical of Judge's content.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
&) Fate Gar” THE PESSIMIST STARTS OUT FOR AN AFTERNOON SPIN Ways of Women WHEN women are sorry for another woman, cither it is because a man failed to marry her, or did marry her. On the Great Day, when Saint Peter opens his books, will the truth finally be known of those famous men Mother might have married instead of her? The modern mother does so much to spare her children, it is a wonder she doesn’t try to take their pills for them. A mother is never certain whether her boy will grow to be a good citizen or will become a United States senator. Mother and Father never agree on what he can afford and as every daughter teaches womanhood she has one more to take her side of the argument. The modern mother occasionally makes the same display of disciplining her children as she makes of her embroidered doilies. —Frances L. Garside. And More Practical The beautiful green of every- thapsodized the Idealist Poet. “What surpasses green?” “Yellow,” replied the Practical Poet. “That comes in larger denominations.” Some People You Have Known RS. N. V. UTHERZ is a young married woman of good appear- ance and bad judgment. She is devoting her life to losing friends and keeping up with the socially prominent. Mrs. Utherz has a rich store of contumely for any or all of her friends who show symp- toms of success. Whenever anyone gets ahead of her in dress or attention, her husband has to take the consequences, which are considerable. Mr. Utherz works hard, carns a good salary and deserves a happy home; but his wife commandcers his pay Just to Make Him Glad 66 PEAK to me, only speak,” Was the song that he used to sing When blushes still warmed her check And his fancy still was a-wing. The summers have multiplied Since he wooed with the songster’s art, But the plea that he sang and sighed Still is echoing in her heart. Remembering still the plea That he warbled for Love's sweet sake, She considers it right that she Converse till his ear drums ache. —S. E. Kiser. check and denies him his [— desserts. In return she is teaching him to do house- work and to live on canned goods and other proprietary foods. It is said that he knows more about tyranny than any other man in the United States. Mrs. Utherz says that she does not care to be happy. She merely wants to live as well, dress as well and be just as prominent as her most popular ac- quaintances. —H.W. Dee. Mrs. Pry—I don't see how you can tolerate a husband who stays out every night. i Mrs. Sharp—I would, my dear, but you have no idea what dandy movie scenarios his explanations make. Why don't you divorce him ? I sell every one of them. comicbooks.com