Judge, 1916-09-09 · page 10 of 32
Judge — September 9, 1916 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This 1900s satirical story mocks the era's weight-loss obsession and quack medical treatments. Mr. Daly discovers a "miracle cure"—simple sit-ups—that he claims both reduces weight AND prevents wives from complaining about dieting (the real appeal to husbands). The joke escalates through supporting characters: Mr. Chattus, whose wife has tried 261 different obesity cures while gaining 43 pounds, and Mr. Prunes, whose fingernails are damaged from fastening his wife's increasingly tight dresses. The satire reveals the period's absurd diet culture: the "treatment" actually causes stomach damage, requiring doctor visits and restrictive "barley-water" diets—perpetuating the cycle of useless cures. The small cartoon shows children discussing picnic overeating, reinforcing that the period's eating anxieties affected all social classes. The target: predatory "doctors," gullible wealthy men, and the commercial exploitation of women's body image standards.
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A GREAT R. L. GETTIT DALY wore his M regular hunted expression when he entered the reading room of the Last Resort Club; but from the reck- less manner in,which he ordered an at- tendant to bring him a soda-mint and a glass of koumyss, every member within hearing felt sure that Daly had struck it rich. As Daly waited for his liquid refreshment, he placed his hands be- neath his coat-tails, waggled them com- fortably, and confirmed the belief of his fellow members. At last,” said he joyfully, “a have discovered for my wife a weight- reducing system which is not only efficacious, but which also prevents her from telling me all about it at fifteen- minute intervals. In addition to this, I am not obliged to indulge in the un- satisfactory and half-cooked food which is usually forced on a man when his wife is taking an obesity cure.” The occupants of the reading-room looked up from their magazines and newspapers as one man, and their faces brightened so noticeably that one of the more economical membersof the clu ‘was able to shut off three lights without caus- ing any appreciable decrease in the brilliancy of the lighting ‘ell us more about it, Gettit,” urged Mr. George Chattus, whose spouse, the charming Eva Chattus, held the record for taking obesity cures in local soci circles. She had taken 261 different obesity cures in one year, and gained 43 pounds in so doing. Mr, Chattus had a peculiar dark blue complexion, due to the fact that Mrs, Chattus talked him black last I DISCOVERY in the face every evening on the subject of her weight. “Well, reall replicd = Mr Daly, “the whole thing is absurdly simple. I invented the treatment with my friend, Dr. Pullem Throo. Dr. Throo issues the instructions. saying that any lady may obta a sylph-like figure in one month by taking a simple set of exercises, consisting of lying on the floor, wedging the feet beneath some firmly fixed object such as a bath tub, and raising one’s self to a sitting posture one hundred times in quick succession.” That’s old stuff,” interrupted Mr. Fuller Prunes fretfully. “* Alex- ander the Great used that system for cutting down his embonpoint!” Everybody heard Mr. Prunes with respect; for it wasa well-known fact that his finger nails were in a con- stant state of dilapidation because of the difficulty which he experi- enced in hooking up his wife's dresses. “Please don’t crowd me,” protested Mr. Daly. “Just let me tell you the whole story. The new feature about Dr. Throo’s exercises lics in the fact that the person who docs them must do the whole hundred on the very first_ morn- ing. Now if a solidly-built lady who has had little or no exercise attempts to lie on the floor and raise herself to a sitting position one hundred consecutive times, what happens to her?” Mr. Daly accepted his koumyss and soda-mint from the attendant, drank the health of the cagerly-waiting company, A HOME-MADE 5S HADOW Billy Did ye git lots of eats at the picnic > Tommy Gee, you oughta been there, Billy! Why, Thad a stumick ache for three days afterwards ! and resumed his interesting narrative. “The lady’s stomach - muscles,” said Mr. Daly’ impressively, ‘tare as lamed as though an elephant had danced a buck-and-wing on them. — Frightened, she sends for Dr. Throo. Dr. Throo, after feeling of her f nd looking at the base of her tongue. informs her with great seriousness that she has exercised too violently without proper preparation, and that she must take to her bed and live on barley-water and lettuce for one month, if she ever wishes to be able to wear corsets again “Horrified, she instantly takes to her bed, allowing her husband to shift’ for hims nd to come home as late as 3:00 a.m. without protest. “At theend of the month, her re: dict has caused her to lose 25 pou her husband’s dict has not been interfered with. Worry over her condition, as out- lined by Dr. Throo every morning, pre vents her from regaining the 25 pounds as soon as she has escaped from hey bed; and fear of being obliged to go on with the treatment prevents her from boring her husband with her symptoms. Dr. Throo treats the entire matter as confidential and the wife never learns the truth.” “What is Dr. Pullem Throo’s address?” asked Mr. Fuller Prunes eagerly. And when Mr. Daly answered, each of the 18 members of the Last Resort Club who were seated in the reading room made haste to write the address on his cuff, thus showing that Mr. Daly was a bene factor to mankind.--K. L. Roberts. Ise ricted nds, and