Judge, 1916-06-17 · page 16 of 28
Judge — June 17, 1916 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several brief satirical pieces mocking early 20th-century social conventions and relationships. The main cartoon depicts a golf outing at Hot Springs, Arkansas. The caption's joke hinges on a husband viewing his wife as equipment—"necessary to the game, but awfully hard to handle"—like a golf putter. The accompanying dialogue satirizes marital gift-giving: a wife pressures her husband for an expensive gift, he reluctantly agrees to a $40 budget, then she spends $35 on candlesticks anyway, claiming nobody gives single items as gifts. Other brief pieces mock: - **"Luck"**: A pessimist's horseshoe that's caused disasters, not fortune - **"Life's Bitterness"**: A schoolboy's cynicism about childhood being life's "happiest days" - **"A Busy Maid"**: A woman married eight times whose maid tracks her husbands - **"Reducing the Cost of Living"**: A poem about gardening's false economy—the labor costs more than savings - **"Sufficiency"**: A cryptic joke about finding girls "interesting" The satire targets marriages, consumerism, and self-deception.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Isabel—Is Jack fond of his wife? higher on purpose, in order to get you to agree to what she really wants, and you begin to regret that you hadn’t insisted on twenty-five. “Isn't forty too much?” you assert. “Positively not!” “Oh, very well,” loftily. ‘Now, that's off our minds. It only remains” (you say this with a look of almost human intelli- gence,) “to sclect the gift.” But can’t you suggest something?” Why certainly,” you reply, “something original, in good taste, that they will enjoy and that will show thought on our part, to cost not over forty dollars.” “But what?” At that you rise up decisively and with an air of intense magnanimity you declare: “I'm willing to leave it to you, my dear. You're splendid at such things. It's su perbly in your line. Any suggestions on my part might be a handicap.” And the next evening you say to her: “By the way, what did you get Eleanor?” “Oh, the sweetest, dearest, daintiest pair of candlesticks. “How much did you pay for them?" “Think of it—only $35." AT THE HOT SPRINGS (ARKANSAS) GOLF Jane—I think he classes her with his putter—necessary to the game, but awfully hard to handle “You mean You look at her re proachfully, recalling the bargain “For each of them?” And she smiles back almost petulantly, as she replies: “Who ever heard of giving anybody only dlestick?” one Luck “1 see you have a door,” said the brought any luck?” “Well, it has tumbled down half a dozen horseshoe over the Pessimist. “Has it ever times, and never killed anybody yet,” replied the Optimist Life's Bitterness Mother—Cheer up, littl man! School days will be the happiest of your life Mother's little man (bitterly) —Swell chanst—with my pitchin’ wing on the bum, an’ I’m a rotten football player A Busy Maid “She was married today for the eighth time, IT believe: “Who was the genfleman?” “T don’t know, she said her maid always kept the record of such details.” CLUB Reducing the Cost of Living ight by ten, pot to see; Tis but a little patch, but then Ivs b for me, For there, with spade within my hand I've toiled from morn to night With hope that produce from this land Would Costuvliving smite; There would [ raise tomatoes, corn, Peas, lettuce So that expenses might be shorn And T could profit much beans and such. 1 wouldn't trade that garden small For acres twenty-four; See, both my hands are blistered, all My bones and joints are sore; The cash I've spent on lotions would Have kept my table bright For months with most expensive food appe ith my sf Gone is glee say, my fe and hoe, A. Walter Utting Sufficiency! Milly—Is she an interesting, proper sort of girl? Billy She's interesting! comicbooks.com