Judge — April 22, 1916 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE LINE OF LEAST RESISTANCE MARKOWITZ AND HENRY DISCUSS PINOCLE AND PEDAGOGUES Ry Lov Humbug!” exclaimed Max Markowitz the skirt manufacturer, as he was waiting for a pinocle quorum to assemble at his father-in-law’s. ‘Minnie wants to be stylish, so she fixed up a libry; and if we gota libry, we got to have a book-case; and a book- case without fancy books is like a foist class show room without models. So she bought an assortment of books in the latest colors to match the wall paper, and our Polish goil is not yet finished cutting the pages. But you know, Henry, the kind of pages I like to cut! It’s from a little book with forty-eight loose leafs and plenty of pic——’ “Oh you mean pinocle!” interrupted Henry Shapiro, Marko- itz’s bookkeeper and brother-in-l “What then do I mean, Shakespeare?” questioned Markowitz. “And even the big Shakespeare ain’t got notting on auction pino- cle! Ain’t every deal got a different play and a different scenery? You get more action in ‘auction’ in a minute than Shakespeare got ina Hamlet. I remember how sad Jacob Adler looked when he played in King Lear; but Henry, if you would see Harry man’s face, what used to be in human hair goods but now is in the fancy shoe business, when he went bate by one point, on a four hun- dred hand in shippe with a kitty, you would say that King Lear was dancing a kasatske! Every pinocle game, just like Shake- speare’s plays, what I saw in People’s Theayter, commences with —what do you call it? Something that’s in a play but isn’t in the play —” “You mean a prologue,” suggested Henry. “That's right, a prologue,” repeated Markowitz. “Every game commences with a prologue with three people bidding their heads off trying to find out a secret with three cards; and when one feller gets the secret, oder he throws up his hand and pays his own funcral expenses or the other two fellers try to moider him and take away his money; just like in a regular play. Don’t you think we ain't got a chorus, too? Sure! About a half dozen kibetzers who sing out advice when nobody asks them, just like by Shakespeare. Them kibetsers are so welcome like a mouse in a kaffe-klatsch, but what do they care! Henry, do you know what Minnie done last night?” How should I know asked Henry, shrugging his shoulders. She put away the cards and chips some place,” continued Markowitz, “that even an installment collector couldn’t find them. I looked all over; in the washtubs and in the victrola; but you books? iross- RAR might so well look for children in a swell apartment house! Minnie was mad like anything because I wouldn’t go skating with her. So when she went away to your house, with looks that would kill even a book agent cus and Grossman came around; we sent down for a new dec nd pinocled and smoked and drunk hot tea like a prince in Pari “But how did you get along without the chips?" asked jt down on a piece of paper,” replied Marko- witz. ‘But between me and you, I was ashamed of him. already going on twelve and he adds like I skate. When Grossman made a big hand, on account of that /emech Marcus playing trump under me, when even a baby with a bottle would play clubs and clubs and clubs, my Lester got so mixed up with the accounts, like he was making out an income tax report for a real estatnik, with war He's [MEN WANTED] FOR THE | UNITED STATES | ~My! we have all sorts of competition, don’t we?” comicbooks.com