Judge — February 19, 1916 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

From a Sinner’s Diary "S easy enough to boss when they'll mind. - When you say a person is long-headed it does not mean he goes headlong IT know a man who is (not) just to his family a the neighbors. I know a sinner who has done some- thing he ought to have left undone, and a saint who has undone something he should have left done up. I know a woman who takes up her cross the minute she sees it if it breaks her back. Being neighborly — trading something you don’t want for somethin, uu do. Love—glimpses of heaven and real, long staring spells into the other place. Housecleaning —doing evil that good may come. Youcan tell whether they're mistakes by whose favor they’re in. Be worse than it is if we knew “last times” at the time, wouldn’t it? It would ruin me to dig ma a posy bed half as big as 1 le up hunting for ° A telephone beats religion. People callup that never speak when we meet in the road. Don’t it beat all? My little cousins, who day before yesterday I went to see as new babies, who yesterday it would have plagued to mention a boy’: ng beside them, today are promenading with beaus. Tomorrow they'll have bundles of flannel of their own to feed paregoric to. Don’t it beat all, I say, that they can catch on and I can’t? There ought to be a law prohibiting the younger children marrying off till the older ones are provided for.—Lynette Freemire. The Popular Authoress “That stringy looking lady going by over there is our well known authoress!”” triumphantly stated the landlord of the Petunia tavern. ‘Her contributions are printed in the big newspapers all over the country. She is an old maid. Her name is Miss Clessaphine Clatter.”” “Strange, but I do not remember having heard anything about her,” said the stranger. “What does she write—poctry?” “Nope; testimonials. She has been cured of "most all the heirs that human flesh is ill to, as the feller said.” Considerate First fish—What is that danger sign for? Second fish—They are afraid someone might fall on us. When Is dress in a sensible way; When every play is worth the price And books are all their publishers say; When goodness counts for more than cash; When boarding houses cease from hash; When women say just what they mean And men mean what they say, forsooth; When bards grow fat and knaves grow lean; When papers always print the truth; When fool-proof motor cars have come the millenniun:!—Walter G. Doty. Off Color Francine—So Cyril gave you the new motorcar! Isn't it just too sweet? Isabel—Oh, 1 don't know. It doesn’t match my furs. Butcher—And now, ma'am, how will you have this chicken dressed ? Bride of @ day—Er—ah, I hardly know. Would it be too much trouble to show me what they are wearing this spring ? comicbooks.com