Judge, 1916-01-22 · page 25 of 28
Judge — January 22, 1916 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page features humorous rural vignettes from a fictional Kentucky town called Hogwallow, presented as reprinted from the "Hogwallow Kentuckian." The column, credited to "George Bingham," satirizes backwoods Americana through absurdist anecdotes about eccentric locals—Frisby Hancock, Slim Pickens, Cricket Hicks, and others engaged in ridiculous activities (a schoolteacher rescheduling terms to avoid heat; a man found with hen eggs in his pockets; someone falling from a tree due to weight). The satire targets rural ignorance, superstition, and peculiar logic while maintaining affectionate humor rather than malice. The column represents Judge magazine's recurring mockery of rural American life as quaint but intellectually limited—a common literary trope of the early 20th century. The page also contains a Cascade Whiskey advertisement promoting "moderate" drinking, and brief local gossip items typical of small-town newspapers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Hogwallow Locals Frisby Hancock took his bass fiddle to the Gander creek bottoms yes- terday and played several selections under hickory trees, but had little success as the hickory nuts are nearly all gone. The Hotel Man at Tickville says the chances of many a good fire are ruined by the untimely arrival of the fire department. installment of a western serial story appeared last week in the dings. The story will come to an end by spring if the press or the heroine doesn’t break down. The Rye Straw Storekeeper, who has bten a bachelor for a long time, told a man the other day that the women folks still dressed up when they came to the store, even if they did not expect to see anybody except him. Some people are graceful while others are disgraceful Slim Pickens is walking around a good deal now trying to reduce his flesh, in order that he can go anywhere a rabbit can this winter. Sidney Hocks has been requested to turn his hat around right, instead of wearin d-part-before. Then people can tell whether he is going to the still house or coming from it Fletcher Henstep was interviewed by the cditor of the Tidings, while in Tickville the other day, and Fletcher is anxious to get this week's issuc so that he can see what the editor says. Frisby Hancock says parents may have more than one set of twins, but that you never hear of twins having more than one set of parents. Yam Sims accompanied the Calf Ribs Widow to the Rye Straw store Tuesday to assist her home with a spool of thread. Cricket Hicks bought a nickel’s worth of nails while at Bounding Billows yesterday, and some decided improvements are looked for in this immediate Fletcher Henstep received his monthly story paper from Augusta, Maine, and is glad to know that the hero did not ride his bicycle off of the high bluff. An addition has been built to the hitch rack at the Hog Ford still house. Cricket Hicks was mingling in railroad circles in Tickville this week, having given the engineer a chew of tobacco. A lot of hen eggs were found in Poke Eazley’s pockets when he was un- expectedly searched at the postofiice Friday. It is believed he came by them dishonestly as nobody remembers having seen a hen around him at all that day. Dock Hocks thinks if a bullet was not always in such a hurry it would gel more game. While gathering persimmons on Muskct Ridge one day this week, Slim Pickens fell out of the tree, but on account of his weight was not seriously injured. The Wild Onion School Teacher, one of the smartest men since the days of Jesse James, will begin his next spring’s term of school within a few days now. He has decided to make this forward step to climinate the hot weather period of school. By beginning the spring and summer term now it will be through with long before the hot weather begins, and then he can take up his fall and winter term and carry it through the hot months, thus doing away with the necessity of a fire in the stove. People who live in stone houses should not throw glasses. In the excitement of the busy social whirl Miss Rosy Moseley has forgot where she stuck her chewing gum the last time Faint heart never won fair lady. Raz Barlow presented Miss Flutie Belcher with a nice bunch of possum grapes Sunday. The Hogwallow Improvement Association announces, after a business meeting Tuesday night, that it is very well pleased with the new hat worn by Miss Cordelia Hellwanger.—George Bingham in Hogwallow Kentuckian. The bigot has lost caste in America. It is the moderate man who has authority—the man who knows how to use and not misuse. You will find thousands of moderate men using a wonderfully mild and mellow Whiskey —Wilson—Real Wilson—That’s All! The Whiskey for which we invented the Non-Refillable Bottle FREE CLUB RECIPES—Free booklet of famous club recipes for mixed drinks. Address Wilson, 315 Fifth Ave, N.Y. That's All! THE road to pure whisky is an arduous one—the road to mellow whisky is a long one — our faithfulness in following both these roads, care and time, is what makes Cascade distinctive, Original Botiling has Old Gold Label. GEO. A. DICKEL & Co. Distillers Nashville, Tenn. comicbooks.com