Judge — September 25, 1915 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- Fire Prevention Z Safety's Sake-Dembind Cleaning Fluid Removes Grease Spots Instantly Cleans all materials without Injury to fabric of color. Silk, Satin, Lace, Wool, Cashmere, Cotton, Velour, Felt, Velvet, Madras, Net, Lisle, Flannel, Serge, Gauze, Chiffon, White Kid Gloves Coats, Cloaks Cloth Uppers ‘Silk and Satia Slippers Neckties Fer Neckwear Coat Collars Be Feathers Puraitere Covers Veils Dresses Portieres Hosiery Parasols ‘Tapestries Lingerie Wraps Rog Jabots Overs Capes Carpets Typewriters ‘Ribbons Piano Keys Aato-Apparel ‘AS, 2%c, $c, $1 Size Bowles, All Drug Stores To enjoy real Autumn delights there is 72> E nothing better than good old Nourishing fou It will make you responsive to every thrill and fill you with the glow of health that reaches 100 plus. Tunes up Home Sweet Home to concert pitch. In bottles and splits. All Good Dealers Use This Chest a A Piedmont Souther Red Cedar Chest protects furs te mo de “Ub dave tree trial. Low redoced prices B you decile to keels the Chest. pali ty ws. Write for hamtsome 64-gage illustrared catalog, Piedmont Red Cedar Crest Ce, Dept. 42, Statewvttl Yarns of the Ball Players By ED A. GO ¥ Nap Lajoie, Philadelphia American League HE rookies surely are a source of splendid entertainment in balldom,” remarked Nap Lajoie, the Athletics’ second baseman, who has been a star in the big show almost as long as the present-day fan can remember. “I remember the case of a catcher who joined the Chicago club. He came from a poor family in a small New England town and never had eaten a dollar meal in his life before he became a profes- sional ball tosser. On the second trip with his team he and his fellow players were quartered in one of the best hotels in Boston. The rooms were magnificent. Each sleep- ing room had an alcove and a separate dressing room, all splendidly furnished. However, we had scarcely settled down when the catcher went to the manager with a kick. “*You've got to change my room,’ he said, ‘I won't stand for it.’ “What's the trouble? Isn’t it good enough for you?’ “*Well,’ he blustered, ‘both of the other catchers have rooms with pianos in them, and there isn’t any in mine. I won't stand for you playing favorites that way.’ “Here’s one I heard about some Pirate recruits who were made to feel foolish while training at West Baden about four years ago. A couple of these embryo ball tossers were bragging about their speed and dis- cussing how long they would have to be in the big show before they made Ty Cobb hustle to retain his laurels. On the end of the players’ bench sat a stocky, little, middle- aged man, plainly dressed and with a large quid of tobacco bulging in his left cheek. “*They don’t run bases to-day like they used to,’ cut in the stranger. “The bushers glowered at the interloper and endeavored to freeze him with their frowns, but he refused to be silenced and spoke with a show of authority on several other things pertaining to the National pastime. “ Finally one of the rookies could stand it no longer, and sarcastically inquired, ‘Aw, where did you ever play ball, that you've got so much to say?’ “Why I've had some little experience,’ replied the strange bench warmer. ‘I stole bases in 1891 when I was with the Phil- lies. My nante is Bill Hamilton.’” The Wrong Man A EAWYER, who had to attend curs Chicago next day, before retina the night asked the telephone Operati be him at four o'clock that he might ort) 4:20 a. m. train on the Illinois Cosret Springfield. Accordingly four o'clock and the operator remembered the al, was so drowsy as to err in the ‘Number, instead of the lawyer rang the Reve! Jones. After she had strained the ee se’ i umes ihe minister rolled out al ad and somnambulated to the lephone said: * NY “Hello! What do you want” “It is four now,” the operator pokiey plied. erator policy “A funeral?” questioned the minister “You misunderstand me,” answered te centra AY Stanley,” the reverend Rentlemay repeated. “No, that isn’t what I said,” exci the girl becoming frustrated. a “Not quite dead?” echoed the minister ig excited tones. “You are quite a dunce,” retumed the operator fiercely. “Me, come at once?” queried the se. nambulist. At this the temper of the ‘Operator escaped all bounds, and she shouted, “You old fx, wake up; or else go to bed and hold yor tongue.” “Well, well!” exclaimed the mizise awaking, “what can this all mean?” andiy hung up the receiver. “Yes,” snapped the girl to henef “That's just like a lawyer!” Those Exclusive Early Families In the April issue we printed the pom read by Dr. Samuel C. Bushnell at the dinner of the Harvard Alumni of Watebey and the verses written in retort by Dea Jones of Yale. Dr. Bushnell’s lines were: I come from good old Boston, The home of the bean and the cod, Where Cabots speak only to Lowells, And the Lowells speak only to God. Dean Jones’s counter was: Here's to the town of New Haven, The home of the truth and the light, Where God speaks to Jones, Y In the very same tones ‘That he uses with Hadley and Dwight. A correspondent from Bronxville, Ne York, who in the course of his letter tabs occasion to write some very pleasant ws about The Bookman, offers this as te authentic version of the lines read by De Bushnell: Tam from Massachusetts, The land of the sacred cod, Where the Adamses snub the Abbotts And the Cabots walk with God. —The Bookms. Suffering Terribly—‘“ My wife gts cold the other day and she is sufiemy terribly,” said the fat man. “That so?” inquired the thin ms “What is it, pneumonia?” “No, it is nothing serious.” “Then why is she suffering so mi “She is so hoarse that she can’t talk Cincinnati Enquirer.