Judge — September 11, 1915 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SUGGESTION FOR A NEW FIVE-CENT PIECE who owes so much he has to walk on the other side of the street, its periodical and habitual drunkard, its society belle, its preacher whom the sinner believes is drawing too big a salary, its dangerous railroad crossing, and its drug store on the corner. Public sentiment in the country town is strong, and when a man or a woman does a thing that is wrong, the people tell each other of it, with the full understanding, of course, that the listener is not to say anything about-it. There is a young woman in every town whose engagement to a man has been of long duration. The couple began when both were young and good to look upon, and though everybody in the town knows that they should have married long ago if they intended .to, the couple ex- pects the jaded public to take the announcement of their wedding with a flush of surprise. And when the happy event does transpire the beauti- ful and charming bride looks like a string bean in autumn. There is also in every town an clite milliner who goes to market once or twice a year to get the newest ideas in the latest creations from Paris; and the town band is also prevalent at certain seasons. A band is liable to be born at any time anywhere, so everybody would just as well be prepared for it. This band makes a noise once a week in some vacant room over a store, or in some large hall where fhe military company used to drill for the encampment. This also brings up the subject of home- talent plays. As is well known, every town has to stand for a home-talent play every now and then, for the sake of somebody or something. It is put on at the opera house. ‘The newspaper urges everybody to come out and insures them that besides being royally entertained, they will lend a helping hand to a worthy cause. Of course everybody goes, because nearly everybody has a rela- tive or very dear friend in the play. The editor or reporter gets a free ticket, if he fF OCIOLO-O. ax) cp in ——Sa insists, and in the next issue he gives the opinion that the play was a success from start to finish, and would do credit to the product of the professional companies. The play has to be repeated the following night. Then, in the course of home-town events, there comes the time when a circus must unload at carly morn. The grand free street pageant comes along at high noon on Jow-gear, exactly two hours behind time— rain or shine. One of the first things the spectators do is to count the elephants, and the show is judged very much by that. If there are only two or three underfed, rusty-looking elephants that walk sidewise, there are many persons who will hesitate RELIEF DESIRED “Polly Highpiper is going to Italy to study singing.” Yo, really? ut where is the money coming from?” “Oh, the neighbors subscribed.”