Judge, 1915-09-11 · page 11 of 28
Judge — September 11, 1915 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains **three separate satirical pieces** typical of early 20th-century American humor: 1. **"The Best Little Girl in the World"** (main illustration): A serialized story-cartoon about a young woman named Myrtilla whose sea voyage takes an unexpected turn when her father appears instead of her expected companion "Horatio." The narrative plays on melodramatic plot twists—the surprise revelation, the fainting heroine, the mysteriously "mislaid" love interest. It's satirizing the overwrought romantic stories popular in contemporary fiction. 2. **"Vital Point"**: A joke mocking rigid Boston parenting—a father's blunt denial of Santa Claus framed as philosophical discussion rather than simple gift-withholding. 3. **"Losing Weight"**: A domestic comedy where a wife leaves her husband after a fortune teller's prediction, which he misinterprets as weight-loss advice. All three pieces rely on **domestic scenarios and relationship comedy** rather than political satire, reflecting Judge's general editorial focus on social manners and modern life humor.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE BEST LITTLE GIRL IN THE WORLD “Where to, sir?” asked the Captain, addressing the man, with a respectful salute. “Havana!” Myrtilla started—for it was she. “Havana?” she cried. “I thought we were going to Boston.” “T have business in Havana,” returned the man, shortly. And then, standing in the full glow of the binnacle lights the man removed his motor-garments and goggles. Myrtilla gazed transfixed into his eyes for a moment, and with a low moan murmured. “FATHER!” “The same,” said her companion. “Whom did you expect?” “But—but—WHERE IS HORATIO?” she stammered. “Horatio?” echoed the man. ‘Hora Why—was Horatio coming too?” But there was no answer. Myrtilla lay limp upon the mahogany deck, and the trim little yacht continued on her way to Havana. @ @ @ And you, dear reader—are you too asking “‘ Where is Horatio?” Alas, we know not, for in the excitement of this unusual complica- tion Horatio was unfortunately mislaid, and we have seen neither hide nor hair of him since. Opposites Madge—So you consider it an ideal match? Moarjorie—Yes; he has money and she knows how to spend it. Vital Point Boston Father—Of course you understand that there is no Santa Claus. Little Son—Is this a philosophical discussion or merely a hint that I’m not going to get anything for Christmas? LOSING WEIGHT She read my palm and told me I and twenty pounds.” “She's a wonderful lose one hundr And you did?” “Yes, my wife left me the very next day.”