Judge, 1915-08-14 · page 9 of 28
Judge — August 14, 1915 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This Judge magazine page contains satirical short humor pieces typical of early 20th-century American comedy. The main cartoon depicts a bashful man confronted by a "Private Property—No Swimming or Fishing by Law" sign, humorously capturing awkwardness around enforced social boundaries. The text sections below use deadpan, ironic humor: they present situations where stated reasons mask real motivations. For example, "Miss Placed Confidence died...because Dr. Quackem was the practicing physician" darkly jokes about quack doctors, while "Colonel Heeza Bluff deplored war orders...inas-much as his concern had been overlooked" satirizes hypocritical pacifism motivated by lost business. The smaller pieces mock common romantic and domestic scenarios—overbearing mothers, awkward courtship, unsolicited marriage advice—with punny or paradoxical humor ("Physical Impossibility," "His Supposition"). The tone is cynical about human nature: people claim noble motives while pursuing selfish interests.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
pk A DELICATE SITUATION FOR A BASHFUL MAN WITH A STRONG SENSE OF DUTY If They Printed the Whole Story (The italics never appear) VER a thousand invitations have been issued for the ceremony, because the bride and groom hope to have a furnished apartment, Mr. Henpeck is enjoying a vacation, as Mrs. Henpeck is spending the summer at the shore. Miss Placed Confidence died last evening after a brief illness, because Dr. Quackem was the practicing physician. Mr, Swellfront has placed a second mort- gage on his home, because the Fierce-Bur- row agency has just delivered a 1916 limousine. That her press agent might spring a new one, Miss Flora Footlights threw herself socompletely into the role of Juliet at the Opera House last evening that she fell over the balcony rail. The Misses Sara Sixty and Fannie Fifty have decided to again spend their vacation at Newport, in a final effort to land a husband. Colonel Heeza Bluff, president of the Short Time Manufacturing Company, stated in a public address last evening § that he deplored the acceptance of war orders by American manufacturers, inas- much cs his concern had been overlooked. Categorical Lenient papa—Billy, don’t ask so many questions. Remember that ‘‘ curiosity killed the cat."* Question-mark Billy—Whose cat? Per Contra Conscience makes cowards of us all—Dis- cretion is the better part of valor. ANOTHER CASE OF KIDNAPPING Of Course AMMA was taking daughter to task. “I don’t like the way you and Jack hang over the front gate every evening,"’ she remonstrated. “Well, as to that, there’s a great deal to be said on both sides,’’ replied daughter. Physical Impossibility Mrs. Crabshaw—When you were in the hammock with that young man, didn’t I see his arm around you? Marjorie — Why, mamma, we couldn't both sit in that hammock without squeez- ing a little. His Supposition **So much good advice is constantly being bestowed upon engaged couples, and so much of it goes unheeded,"’ re- marked Professor Pate, ‘‘that I am con- strained to believe that love also laughs at jawsmiths."’ Abysmal Sadness Of all sad words of tongue or pen, For which we pay good money, The saddest is dramatic dope, When the critic thinks he’s funny! comicbooks.com