Judge — August 7, 1915 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

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Chicago, IIL, | Send tence one complete model Mandel-tte Camera outf Inctodina' ling ebb 0 of pe peat care ae eer etn iy i seeamiarien enna ah cereale | | SE aceiyainres arenes Promoter of health and happiness AL Bunker Hill Breweries, Boston Established 1821 Send for Booklet PARK & TILFORD New York Distribut Funabout Fords A regular book of side splitting funniest stories and poems about Ford autos. 64 pages, board cover, 2 colors. Only 23¢ Prepaid. THE HOWELL CO, 608 S. Dearborn St, Dep: C-247, Chicago eyes blazing fiercely. I thought he'd surely knock the other man’s brains out, and I stepped right in between them.’ The young son of the family had become so hugely interested in the narrative as it proceeded that he had stopped eating his pudding. So proud was he of his father’s valor, his eyes fairly shone, and he cried, “*He couldn't knock any brains out of you, could he, father?"’ Father looked at him long and earnestly, but the lad's countenance was frank and open. Prather gasped slightly and resumed his supper.—Philadelphia Ledger. A Compromise— Uncle (to nephew playing a war game with a chum)—If you take the fortress within a quarter of an hour, I'll give you a quarter. Youngster (a minute later)—Uncle, the fortress is taken. Now let me have the quarter. Uncle—How did you manage it so quickly? Youngster—I offered the besieged ten cents, and they capitulated. — Christian Register. "Way Up Out o’ Sight—Private Doherty was six feet four in his socks; the sergeant was much shorter. The sergeant looked along the line. ‘‘Head up, there, Doherty!’ he cried. Doherty raised his head. ‘‘Up higher!"’ said the little sergeant. ‘‘There, that’s better! Don’t let me see your head down again."” **Am I to be always like this?’’ asked Doherty, staring away above the little ser- geant’s head. “*You are.’” “Then I'll say good-by to ye, sergeant, for I'll never see yez again.''—Pittsburgh Chronicle- Telegraph. High Stakes—A well-known New Jersey doctor was playing golf with a well-known New Jersey minister. “Well, what are we playing for?'’ asked the doctor. “‘Why, it’s rather out of my line to put up anything,"’ replied the minister. “Well,” sted the doctor, ‘‘we ought to play for something; so I'll put up a pill, and you put up a prayer.’’ — Everybody's Magazine. Not the Same Joke BROwN and Hinton were out to luncheon. Brown asked Hinton, *‘If Jack John- son, Charlie Chaplin and Billy Sunday were coming down the street together, what would you say they looked like?’’ Hinton gave it up, and then Brown re- plied, ‘‘They would look like a chocolate nut sundae.’* Hinton, on arriving home that evening, told his wife of his luncheon with his friend and added, ‘Brown told me a good joke to-day."’ “‘What is it?'’ asked Mrs. Hinton, to which her husband glibly replied, ‘‘If Billy Johnson, De Wolf Hopper and Billy Sunday were coming down the street together, what would you have?"’ Mrs. Hinton puzzled a minute or two, then gave it up as she replied, ‘‘I don't know, I'm sure. Tell me." **A frappe,’’ replied Hinton, and he won- dered why it didn’t sound as funny as when Brown gave him the answer, and why his wife didn’t think the joke a good one. ley ss Cola co ast more than a Ge anes ee ae sc so) d takes new) Degas: RES Acca The Goca- Gla Go. ‘A remarkabl ive ev | A remarkable complete and comprehensive cxclopedia of te The Law! Is C Calling Yc Yous. A Aue ee fa sion of alltimeisofferedto you. | Wealt pails within your reach dome direete gen 281%" 3 eS wed amone 86 wee ‘tote te: